Editore"s Note
Tilting at Windmills

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March 22, 2006
By: Kevin Drum

THE APOCALYPSE CONTINUED....You want a sign of the apocalypse? I'll give you a sign of the apocalypse. According to the OCLC, the 15th most widely held book in its member libraries as of 2005 was....Garfield at Large. Take that, Shakespeare.

Kevin Drum 4:48 PM Permalink | Trackbacks | Comments (136)

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James Garfield was a stellar president who has been sadly underrated. I'm glad to see him getting the recognition he deserves, even at this late date.

Posted by: shortstop on March 22, 2006 at 4:53 PM | PERMALINK

Me too, shortstop! Did you know Garfield could write in Greek with one hand and in Latin with the other, simultaneously?

Posted by: Alek Hidell on March 22, 2006 at 5:01 PM | PERMALINK

Could it really have fallen that far down the list?

Posted by: Boronx on March 22, 2006 at 5:02 PM | PERMALINK

Take that, Shakespeare.

Um, but Hamlet's at #9...

It does seem a tad out of place, though, unless you argue that modern comic strips are the new equivalent of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland", "Mother Goose" and "The Night Before Christmas..."

Posted by: Adam Piontek on March 22, 2006 at 5:03 PM | PERMALINK

And, at the same time, use his tongue to give himself a bath.

Posted by: Rick on March 22, 2006 at 5:04 PM | PERMALINK

No, shortstop. This is the cartoon Garfield -- and a widely distorted view of his presidency. I mean, you think he really cared that much about cream? In any case, it is a better Hobbesian choice than "Calvin: Still Coolidge After All These Years."

Posted by: Kenji on March 22, 2006 at 5:05 PM | PERMALINK

Kenji, HA!

Posted by: shortstop on March 22, 2006 at 5:11 PM | PERMALINK

All I want to know is where Dan Brown stands! Finest work of fiction since before the last piece of Critchon crap published.

Posted by: Jeff II on March 22, 2006 at 5:11 PM | PERMALINK

Garfield is very much an outlier on the list. It's basically a list of classics that old people think young people should read because....

Posted by: decon on March 22, 2006 at 5:11 PM | PERMALINK

Harumph!! - Not Stalwart enough for me - Viva la Patronage

Posted by: Charles Guiteau on March 22, 2006 at 5:11 PM | PERMALINK

Holy crap. Going down the top 100, looking for books published in the past century, I see only Tolkein, Baum (Wizard of Oz), and London (Call of the Wild), with five or six cartoon collections. That is, all pretty much fantasy. Does that say anything?

Posted by: RSA on March 22, 2006 at 5:12 PM | PERMALINK

According to a well placed source (rubbed shoulders with higher eschelons of Pentagon, spent time in Green Zone), who's nameless because s/he's not ready to retire, the book on all the generals' shelves in Iraq is The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell. This may sound like a joke because we imagine they are reading tomes on anti-insurgency warfare or How to Prevent a Civil War for Dummies, not some pop-psych/soc book. But it's the truth. Probably all you need to know to evaluate the military performance in Iraq.

Posted by: anonymous on March 22, 2006 at 5:18 PM | PERMALINK

There's something wrong with a world in which Garfield is #15 but the Far Side doesn't appear until #115. Was Diebold involved in compiling this list?

Posted by: craigie on March 22, 2006 at 5:18 PM | PERMALINK

Did you know Garfield could write in Greek with one hand and in Latin with the other, simultaneously?

Is that what it took to get laid back then? No wonder they invented the Porsche.

Posted by: craigie on March 22, 2006 at 5:19 PM | PERMALINK

The big mystery is why people are reading Garfield in 2006. I thought this strip died about 1981--does it still exist? Is it syndicated in red-state newspapers everywhere for the hearty breakfast-time enjoyment of people with senses of humor like _____, ______ and _______*?

*Troll names omitted to protect the guilty against attacks ad hominem

Posted by: shortstop on March 22, 2006 at 5:21 PM | PERMALINK

Hey,

Wanna be on Jeopardy? Online tryouts,

http://jeopardy.com/contestants_searchinfo.php

Posted by: cld on March 22, 2006 at 5:24 PM | PERMALINK

*Troll names omitted to protect the guilty against attacks ad hominem

uncle. Uncle!

Posted by: craigie on March 22, 2006 at 5:24 PM | PERMALINK

No Zippy the Pinhead?

Posted by: Hostile on March 22, 2006 at 5:25 PM | PERMALINK

Hey, that was kind of snarky of me. And you responded with grace and style, damn you!

Posted by: shortstop on March 22, 2006 at 5:26 PM | PERMALINK

That's because it was "edit twice, post once."

More good advice my mother never gave me. Can we go back to holding hands and bashing tbrosz? I liked it better that way.

Posted by: craigie on March 22, 2006 at 5:29 PM | PERMALINK

I find it baffling that the OCLC "Top 1000" has 1001 entries...but, moving on:

Holy crap. Going down the top 100, looking for books published in the past century, I see only Tolkein, Baum (Wizard of Oz), and London (Call of the Wild), with five or six cartoon collections. That is, all pretty much fantasy. Does that say anything?

You missed, apparently, Diary of Young Girl, which goes against that trend; still, I don't think its much different than the older books, except that newer expressly religious/philosophical works aren't as highly ranked.

But then, its hardly news that popular entertainment becomes widely accepted faster than philosophy.

It is interesting that the top part -- the first couple hundred items -- of the list is dominated by fiction, religion/philosophy, and music, regardless of when it is written, and even below, that trend seems to continue, though history and popular practical advice works seem to crop in more.

Posted by: cmdicely on March 22, 2006 at 5:33 PM | PERMALINK

The list is definitely a sign of Apocalypse, as it not only includes the Bhagvad Gita and Rubayat by Omar Khayyam but gives them very high ranks.

Devil's work, I tell you.

Posted by: lib on March 22, 2006 at 5:33 PM | PERMALINK

Has anybody actually read "Beowulf?" Bloody, bloody, and a monster name Grendal or grumpy or something like that.

Posted by: Ron Byers on March 22, 2006 at 5:33 PM | PERMALINK
All I want to know is where Dan Brown stands!

Just beneath Idiot.

Posted by: cmdicely on March 22, 2006 at 5:35 PM | PERMALINK

Of course we've read Beowulf. Do you think they give away these Effete Ivory-tower Elitist Liberal Loser buttons for nothing?

It's Grendel.

Posted by: shortstop on March 22, 2006 at 5:36 PM | PERMALINK

Can we go back to holding hands and bashing tbrosz? I liked it better that way.

Okay, but if your hand keeps wandering like the last time, I'll give you just 45 minutes to knock it off.

Posted by: shortstop on March 22, 2006 at 5:38 PM | PERMALINK

The sign of the apocalypse would be more obvious if this was a list to the top 1000 books that people checked out from the library. This list tells you more about what librarians think is important, and can afford to pay for, than anything else.

The afford to pay for clause explains why there are so few books from the past 100 years. Most (75%, or more) of those are still under copyright and are more expensive. You have to pay money to get Garfield; the Bible people are giving away.

Posted by: Ray on March 22, 2006 at 5:48 PM | PERMALINK

Heh, indeedy!

Posted by: craigie on March 22, 2006 at 5:48 PM | PERMALINK

people keep trying to give me bibles. i keep telling them my psychotropic druggie days are behind me.

Posted by: elfranko on March 22, 2006 at 5:56 PM | PERMALINK

Only us old-timers have time to read library books. Younger workers are too busy working two or three jobs for no benefits.

That particular Garfield book, incidently, is a heavily coded describtion of the Rapture.

Posted by: Hedley Lamarr on March 22, 2006 at 5:59 PM | PERMALINK

hedley lamarr,

If you're not kidding, could you describe how?

Posted by: cld on March 22, 2006 at 6:04 PM | PERMALINK

I believe that and "My Pet Goat" are required reading for a yale degree.

Posted by: Pechorin on March 22, 2006 at 6:07 PM | PERMALINK

Garfield at Large is not the #15 book. They just used cover of the first book in the Garfield series as an illustration. All the different editions in Garfield series of books, for some reason, were counted as a single book in this survey. The three books in The Lord of the Rings series were also pooled together, you might notice, as were various Bible translations and editions.

Posted by: hilker on March 22, 2006 at 6:07 PM | PERMALINK

I think that makes me feel worse, not better, hilker. All these Garfield books still floating around American libraries. It's just creepy.

Posted by: shortstop on March 22, 2006 at 6:09 PM | PERMALINK

You think it's bad skimming the list, try a keyword search on your favorite contemporary authors.

Nothing for mine (Pynchon, Foster Wallace, DeLillo, Gaddis, Barth ... )

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 22, 2006 at 6:12 PM | PERMALINK

Garfield goes risqu,

http://img50.imageshack.us/img50/470/garfieldgoesspelunking4ae.jpg

Posted by: cld on March 22, 2006 at 6:44 PM | PERMALINK

It's Grendel. Posted by: shortstop

Have you read John Gardner's Grendel?

Posted by: Jeff II on March 22, 2006 at 6:44 PM | PERMALINK

The big mystery is why people are reading Garfield in 2006. I thought this strip died about 1981--does it still exist? Is it syndicated in red-state newspapers everywhere for the hearty breakfast-time enjoyment of people with senses of humor like _____, ______ and _______*? Posted by: shortstop

Oh, gawd, don't get me started on lame cartoons. Blondie, Cathy, Hi & Lois, Family Fucking Circle, Zits, Baby Blues, Beetle Bailey, Better Half, Dennis the Menace, Popeye, Tumbleweeds? Who in the hell finds the humor in any of these?

Posted by: Jeff II on March 22, 2006 at 6:51 PM | PERMALINK

"You want a sign of the apocalypse?"

How about the fact that we have an incompetent MORON in the White House, who thinks God placed him in office and then told him to illegally invade and occupy Iraq ?
.

Posted by: VJ on March 22, 2006 at 6:54 PM | PERMALINK

But...it's Garfield!!

Oh and VJ: incompetant kings, tyrants, prime ministers and presidents is par for the course in human history.

Posted by: Alexander Wolfe on March 22, 2006 at 6:55 PM | PERMALINK

His government "reductions" were all taken out of the Defense Department. Posted by: Campesino
No. The number of people employed by the federal government was reduced across the board.
http://www.brookings.edu/comm/policybriefs/pb45.htm
Whereas federal government employment has actually grown during the Bush years.
http://www.brookings.edu/gs/cps/light20030905.htm
Take that, you drive-by loser!
Posted by: Jeff II on March 21, 2006 at 9:13 PM | PERMALINK

You need to quit being led around by the nose and look at real numbers:
http://www.census.gov/govs/www/apesfed93.html
http://ftp2.census.gov/govs/apes/00fedfun.txt
http://www.dior.whs.mil/MMID/military/history/milhist.htm
1993 - Fed Civilian Employees + Active Duty Military = 4,704,142
Active Military + Fed Civilian Nat Defense Category = 2,631,223
2000 - Fed Civilian Employees + Active Duty Military = 4,283,701
Active Military + Fed Civilian Nat Defense Category = 2,079,383
Total decline in Federal Employment = 420,441
Decline in Active Military + Fed Civilian Nat Defense Category = 551,840
Non-Defense related Federal Employment actually ROSE under Clinton when you look at the numbers from 2,072,919 to 2,204,318
Drive-by yourself!

Didn't want to miss this Jeffy

Posted by: Campesino on March 22, 2006 at 6:57 PM | PERMALINK

And the vastly superior Calvin Hobbes rates only #77. Unbelievable.

Posted by: trotsky on March 22, 2006 at 7:25 PM | PERMALINK

Kevin, this post is excuciatingly inane. Isn't there something to talk about that actually MATTERS?

Like, for instance, encroaching American-style dictatorship (ie. a Parliment that is nothing more than a quaint legacy application of democracy) in the UK?

http://politics.guardian.co.uk/constitution/comment/0,,1724047,00.html

Posted by: Osama_Been_Forgotten on March 22, 2006 at 7:29 PM | PERMALINK

But, Osama, we occasionally need to spout off about something where we know our intellectual inferiors (i.e. everyone in charge) are definitely going to come up short. It's a fool's game, to be sure, but damn it, we have to feel like winners every once in a while.

Posted by: Kenji on March 22, 2006 at 7:53 PM | PERMALINK

Has anybody actually read "Beowulf?" Bloody, bloody, and a monster name Grendal or grumpy or something like that.

Yeah, but that's because I studied Old English. Funnily enough, my introduction to the story was the epic prog rock track 'Grendel', by Marillion. 17 odd minutes, told from the point of view of ol' One Arm himself.

A dishonourable award for worst mangling of the story goes to the crap scifi film ('Beowulf') with Cristopher Lambert. Makes 'The 13th Warrior' look like epic poetry.

In fact, 'Beowulf' the movie made me want to hack my own arm off and nail it to the roof beam.

Posted by: floopmeister on March 22, 2006 at 7:56 PM | PERMALINK

Oh, and considering 'Beowulf' is the first major piece of literature composed in our mongrel bastard of a language, I'm glad it is on the list.

Posted by: floopmeister on March 22, 2006 at 8:00 PM | PERMALINK

The sign of the coming apocalypse is the movie 'Wedding Crashers'.

That joint sucked.

Posted by: Paul K on March 22, 2006 at 8:08 PM | PERMALINK

Hiker is right. Look at all the "comics" listed. They're all the various compilations combined. Considering that Garfield, I believe has the most books for a comic series (I could be wrong), its position makes sense.

Posted by: Karmakin on March 22, 2006 at 9:16 PM | PERMALINK

I have both Garfield at Large and the complete works of Shakespeare in my library.

I feel so proud!

Posted by: Zeno on March 22, 2006 at 9:19 PM | PERMALINK

Having spent a little while repairing books for my local library, I can tell why Garfield is so high up on that list. Kids absolutely LOVE Garfield. Like everyone else, they like to laugh, and the jokes in that comic strip are simple enough for most of them to appreciate. (You'll notice that Peanuts and "Calvin & Hobbes" also pop up in the middle of all those literary classics -- but not nearly so high.) The Garfield books in my library were consistently battered to rags by the number of kids who checked them out -- and the "Calvin & Hobbes" collections didn't fare much better. Harry Potter isn't in it by comparison.

Posted by: Bruce Moomaw on March 22, 2006 at 9:29 PM | PERMALINK

P.S.: In case you're wondering, the collections of all those comics were over in the children's section, NOT the adult section.

Posted by: Bruce Moomaw on March 22, 2006 at 9:31 PM | PERMALINK

Kevin-

This post is excruciatingly inane. Can we please talk about something that actually MATTERS? Like..my blog!

http://threewisemen.blogspot.com

Posted by: Alexander Wolfe on March 22, 2006 at 9:31 PM | PERMALINK

"Did you know Garfield could write in Greek with one hand and in Latin with the other"

Yeah, but it's hard to forgive him for how he let down Gen. Rosecrans at Chickamauga . . .

On the other hand, Calvin & Hobbes might really belong on the list of great literature . . .

Posted by: rea on March 22, 2006 at 9:53 PM | PERMALINK

Is it really that shocking to see the book of a famous cartoon character, something that both children and adults may enjoy, so high up on the list? I'd be worried if most of the books were like that, but they aren't.

Posted by: Brian on March 22, 2006 at 10:17 PM | PERMALINK

Makes 'The 13th Warrior' look like epic poetry.

Why does everybody dog "The 13th Warrior"? I love that flick. Gives a bit more dimension and humanity to our Northern ancestors than is common, e.g. drunken oafs, crazed bearded guys with axes. Jokes, tough battles, harsh conditions, bravery in spite of it all, I mean -- c'mon!

Speaking of monster stories, the Marillion reference just may waken the sleeping beast that is progrock composer rmck1. Perhaps he'll finally give us his opinion of their music....

Posted by: Windhorse on March 22, 2006 at 10:53 PM | PERMALINK

A friend tells me he was visiting his daughter and her third husband when later in the evening they made plans to go dancing. He was amazed to discover that this involved pulling out game controls and becoming a virtual couple, dancing away in a dozen energetic styles while both partners remained seated on the sofa.

Posted by: Michael L. Cook on March 22, 2006 at 11:01 PM | PERMALINK

Garfield is great and everything but I find it almost impossible to believe that Peanuts was only #69. I'll take Snoopy over Garfield any day...

Posted by: E. Nonee Moose on March 22, 2006 at 11:19 PM | PERMALINK

Speaking of monster stories, the Marillion reference just may waken the sleeping beast that is progrock composer rmck1. Perhaps he'll finally give us his opinion of their music....

Their music is pretty much immaterial, in my view. I was always a fan because of Fish's lyrics.

I'll have to ask rmck1 if he knows about a Sydney prog rock band called ,i>Wolfmother. Believe me, if the US hasn't heard of them yet you soon will..

Posted by: floopmeister on March 22, 2006 at 11:20 PM | PERMALINK

i blame all the goddamn cat bloggers.

your pal,
blake

Posted by: blake on March 22, 2006 at 11:22 PM | PERMALINK

If Garfield stopped sucking, that would be a real sign of the Apocalypse.

Posted by: Dave on March 22, 2006 at 11:49 PM | PERMALINK

Windhorse, floop:

Honestly, I've never heard Marillion ...

I remember getting turned on to the online Gibraltar Encyclopedia of Progressive Rock in the late 90s and reading about them, and the style called "neo-prog" (also sometimes "symphonic prog.") All the references to early Genesis and mellotrons made me wary, plus the description of the style as an 80s resurrection of the Genesis-type stream of prog. I've always been a progger because I admire originality and not making a fetish of forms, so I put checking them out aside (I was heavy into the "math rock" of Ruins at that time).

Here's a Marillion story. I'm a stone fan of the legendary English "pronk" outfit The Cardiacs, a band who are cult legends but not very well-known otherwise. From Surrey, they got started in the late 70s and and morphed into a very febrile mix of early 80s million-chordy, ska-ish post punk (XTC, Squeeze, Devo) with solid Golden Age prog influences (early Genesis, Gentle Giant, Frank Zappa). Lots of marvelous time, key and section changes with shrieking English yob vocal mania resembling The Pixies or Andy Partridge and foot-stomping drums (even if your foot is stomping in, like, 19/16). Anthemic as all get-out. They've been likened more than once to a Broadway sensibility (in a good way). And village brass bands. And demented nursery rhymes.

Anyway, like I said, very much the acquired taste. But they've been tremendously influential for a host of other bands, including the Faith No More project, Mr. Bungle (Mr. Bungle is actually inconceivable without The Cardiacs). Fish was so impressed he invited them to open for Marillion, for their first large-scale regional tour.

Well, Marillion fans are apparently the worst kind of prog snobs. They couldn't get past the punkish / dada-ish absurdist presentation. "Eww, they're PUNK ROCK. They sound like SHIT!" They catcalled throughout the show and hurled beer bottles on stage. It got so bad The Cardiacs had to drop off the tour the Marillion fan base were so insufferable.

Now, when it comes to punk rock and punk rockers -- I'm usually on the Marillion side of the argument. But snobbery is snobbery -- and The Cards are progressive as shit in their own way -- perhaps even more excitingly than bands like Marillion, because they're working from basic rock/pop forms and twisting them beyond recognition.

So anyway ... these are some of the things that have given me pause in checking them out. Not that I shouldn't -- not at all. I need to, eventually.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:18 AM | PERMALINK

Bob,

Honestly, the music of Marillion is nothing to write home about. The attraction for me was always lyrical. Heretical - but true. Hell, I've got a number of Marillion picture discs from their heyday, but I don't listen to them very much anymore.

Don't have anything by Mr Bungle - but my favourite band of the moment is The Secret Chiefs 3, which is a project of the guitarist from Mr Bungle (can't remember his name).

Brilliant stuff, but so eclectic as to be uncategorisable.

Posted by: floopmeister on March 23, 2006 at 12:33 AM | PERMALINK

floop:

Trey Spruance!

I talked with him for a good 45 minutes as he was loading his gear after a show in NYC. Pretty interesting dude. He was just commissioned at that time to write a piece for The Kronos (string) Quartet.

He said their big influences were Nintendo games and Slayer. And he denied ever listening to or being influenced by Frank Zappa, which is very hard to believe ...

I'd imagine anything he'd be involved in would be eclectic out the flippin' wazoo.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:37 AM | PERMALINK

BTW, I'll try and chase up some Cardiacs - they sound interesting...

Posted by: floopmeister on March 23, 2006 at 12:39 AM | PERMALINK

That's it - Trey Spruance. The two albums I have are a wonderful trip through Arabic sounds, with a techno soundtrack as programmed by Metallica (!)

Really wild stuff - worth checking out.

But then, I'm pretty heavily into Arabic and more generally Middle Eastern stuff, so it really grabbed me.

Posted by: floopmeister on March 23, 2006 at 12:44 AM | PERMALINK

floop:

"On Land and in the Sea" and "Songs For Ships and Irons" are classic Cardiacs at the height of their powers.

1995's "Sing to God" (a 2-CD set) is considered by many, though, to be their masterpiece. Although the later "Guns" and "Heaven Born and Ever Bright" are both damned good discs as well, though perhaps not quite as intense as the others.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:47 AM | PERMALINK

floop:

I love Middle Eastern music, too. Trey did an Arabic/techno kind of thing on Mr. Bungle's "Disco Volante" (Desert Journey to Techno Allah), which is a very experimental disc.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:50 AM | PERMALINK

I love Middle Eastern music, too. Trey did an Arabic/techno kind of thing on Mr. Bungle's "Disco Volante" (Desert Journey to Techno Allah), which is a very experimental disc.

Ah, then you'll love both Book of M and Book of Horizons. Everything from techno to thrash, all with an Arabic flavour. Well, actually better than a 'flavour' - he apparently with with real traditional players, rather than Westerners havin' a 'bit of a noodle'.

Excellent.

Posted by: floopmeister on March 23, 2006 at 12:55 AM | PERMALINK

floop:

The Secret Chiefs ... I will definitely keep a hairy earball peeled for those discs.

Mr. Bungle's later disc "California" has a very slick production (they share a sensibility with David Lynch -- in fact, snippets of dialogue from Blue Velvet are scattered all over their first record), warping the hell out of what you would at first imagine to be chrome-plated commercial pop tunes ... some of them. But there's a tune on there called Ars Morendi.

It's very, VERY Arabic -- with a stop-time break in some demented approximation of a Macedonian rhythm pattern. So complex I was never able to count it.

I'm also a major, major fan of Balkan folk music.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 1:10 AM | PERMALINK

I'm also a major, major fan of Balkan folk music.

Oh, that's nice stuff. Don't know much about it (apart from Trio Bulgarka!), though I'm interested in chasing more up. Any recommendations?

There was a really heavy Serbian band here in Melbourne back in the 80's that was mixing Serbian folk with slow/heavy metal. It's been lurking at the back of my CD pile for years now - can't remember the name. Now I'll have to go home and drag it out again...

Well, we seemed to have scared everyone else away - and it's 5 pm here so it's time for me to head home.

Bloody Commonwealth Games has driven Melbourne's transport and road system to the brink(!)

We'll have to ramble about music again!

Posted by: floopmeister on March 23, 2006 at 1:26 AM | PERMALINK

floop:

(I know you've toddled off, but perhaps you'll see this tomorrow).

Damn, you know I don't have any names. A former housmate is Bulgarian and she lent me a few CDs that a friend burned. No labelling, no nothing. Some of it was kind of pedestrian cabaret music -- but cabaret music in 7 or 9 :) Others were improvisation-driven in the worst (best) way.

Really amazing the way they could jam like that in additive meter with unpredictable accents ...

Nice talking about music with you, for sure. Thank Windhorse :)

Hehe, and see how it all grew out of a Beowulf reference. Yeah, I've read the book as well ...

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 1:36 AM | PERMALINK

floop:

My mistake: The tune on Mr. Bungle's Disco Volante is Desert Search For Techno Allah.

And there are a number of Middle Eastern guesters on it as well ...

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 3:59 AM | PERMALINK

Hmm, Shakespeare is at #9, and there's also Mark Twain, Vercantes, Homer, Lewis Carroll and Tolkien in front of Garfield. Huuuuge problem?

Posted by: Gray on March 23, 2006 at 4:57 AM | PERMALINK

"No Zippy the Pinhead?"
Or Fat Freddies Cat, or the rest of the freak bro's?

But Go Garfield!!! I have about 12 or 13 of those books. It's good to keep humor alive and well in ones life.

Posted by: Lurker42 on March 23, 2006 at 7:20 AM | PERMALINK

Oh!!! and where's Opus?? Opus is cool. He should be on that list. They must have overlooked him...Poor Opus.

Posted by: Lurker42 on March 23, 2006 at 7:28 AM | PERMALINK

And finaly,

"If Garfield stopped sucking, that would be a real sign of the Apocalypse."
Posted by: Dave

HEY!!! Garfield doesn't suck!!! Garfield is as cool as cats get. Why I have a mind to SNZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

*Nap Attack*

Posted by: Lurker42 on March 23, 2006 at 7:33 AM | PERMALINK

I thought the top 100 was actually rather impressive. Except for maybe 3 or 4 works, the list was one that I'd be proud to have in my home library (ashamed to admit that I'm missing a few of them). I think the bigger concern will be if we got a list of the top 100 circulation figures. I fear that Hamlet, Huck Finn and The Illiad are gathering a lot of dust in our public libriaries.

Posted by: Gary on March 23, 2006 at 8:32 AM | PERMALINK

"I fear that Hamlet, Huck Finn and The Illiad are gathering a lot of dust in our public libriaries." Gary, you might be right, but nearly every high school student reads them (or the cliff notes) at some point. The classics are still classics because they are still being taught.

Posted by: Ron Byers on March 23, 2006 at 8:51 AM | PERMALINK

Have you read John Gardner's Grendel?

How about Matt Wagner's?

Posted by: Gregory on March 23, 2006 at 9:13 AM | PERMALINK

A friend tells me he was visiting his daughter and her third husband when later in the evening they made plans to go dancing. He was amazed to discover that this involved pulling out game controls and becoming a virtual couple, dancing away in a dozen energetic styles while both partners remained seated on the sofa.

Good Ford, who plays Dance Dance Revolution with the gamepad?!?! If you don't get off your butt and do the steps on the dance pad -- which is much more difficult, and quite a good aerobic exercise, I might add -- it doesn't count. Scandalous.

It is odd that someone would use the phrase go dancing do describe an activity that involves staying at home...

Posted by: Gregory on March 23, 2006 at 9:19 AM | PERMALINK

Looking around at the pitiful parish library here, I'd be willing to bet that a list of the books most often actually checked out by patrons would look like this:

1-14) Romance novels

15) Dan Brown's pulp trash

16-24) Diet books.

25) Ann Coulter

I'm a bit mystified that works of music - clearly not books - such as Handel's Messiah and Mozart's Magic Flute are listed.

Posted by: CFShep on March 23, 2006 at 9:28 AM | PERMALINK

Family Fucking Circle

Isn't that that new HBO show?

Posted by: Ace Franze on March 23, 2006 at 9:55 AM | PERMALINK

An electronic video game called Dance, Dance Revolution and played on a gamepad. Wow.

When I was young dancing was foreplay. Literally. People went dancing as a precurser to sex. If they didn't have a partner when the walked into the dance hall, they would meet potential sex partners on the dance floor. All the moving close to each other, the sound of the music, the whole damn thing. Ballroom dancing in particular has always had a highly sexual context.

Some technological changes don't improve life.

Posted by: Ron Byers on March 23, 2006 at 10:00 AM | PERMALINK

Peanuts is in at #69, just ahead of Lame Is Rob.

Posted by: Ace Franze on March 23, 2006 at 10:00 AM | PERMALINK

CFShep: I'm a bit mystified that works of music - clearly not books - such as Handel's Messiah and Mozart's Magic Flute are listed.

Lending music is a big piece of library trade, isn't it? I've never checked any out myself...maybe I should try it.

JeffII: Have you read John Gardner's Grendel?

Long time ago. I seem to remember finding the concept cool but the execution a little weak. Can't remember why, though.

JeffII: Oh, gawd, don't get me started on lame cartoons. Blondie, Cathy, Hi & Lois, Family Fucking Circle, Zits, Baby Blues, Beetle Bailey, Better Half, Dennis the Menace, Popeye, Tumbleweeds? Who in the hell finds the humor in any of these?

Don't forget The Lockhorns, Love Is... and the most annoying strip ever written, Cathy.

Posted by: shortstop on March 23, 2006 at 10:05 AM | PERMALINK

Family Fucking Circle

Isn't that that new HBO show?

Outstanding, Ace.

Posted by: shortstop on March 23, 2006 at 10:06 AM | PERMALINK

Family Fucking Circle

Isn't that that new HBO show?
Posted by: Ace Franze

Wouldn't surprise me in the least.

I think the poster meant that brain dead staple of brain dead comics sections "The Family Circus".

I'm pretty sure that The Daily Advertiser here in Lafayette is going for the record on 25 year old reprints of cartoons by deceased cartoonists.

Honestly, 'Dagwood'?

I can only wish that 'Pogo' was at least among them.

Posted by: CFShep on March 23, 2006 at 10:07 AM | PERMALINK

Shortstop: Lending music is a big piece of library trade, isn't it? I've never checked any out myself...maybe I should try it.

I really don't know. I do suspect just a bit that they're talking actual recordings, of which, along with videos, my local public library has a rather large collection.

I'm going on-line, though, and checking it out. It wouldn't be something I'd encounter since I'm, sadly, functionally illiterate in music despite a smattering of piano lessons and a run at the flute in grade school.

Posted by: CFShep on March 23, 2006 at 10:21 AM | PERMALINK

Speaking as a librarian, two points:
1. This is a snapshot. There are about 40 titles on that list that hold on from year to year. As copies of Garfield get destroyed/stolen and not replaced, it will drop. Next year, there will be another "weird title" in the top twenty.
2. Some libraries do not fully report paperback holdings. I used to work in a place where every year we got multiple paperback copies of every Shakespeare play plus whatever else was being taught in the local public schools. They cycled in and out so fast that going through the motions of adding/deleting from OCLC would be way too much work for small cataloging staffs. So, they get put in the local catalog but not in OCLC.

Posted by: Emma on March 23, 2006 at 10:27 AM | PERMALINK

Family Fucking Circle

Isn't that that new HBO show?

Outstanding, Ace.
Posted by: shortstop

Thanks, Shortstop. And it's nice not to have to explain.

Posted by: Ace Franze on March 23, 2006 at 10:36 AM | PERMALINK

"Non-Defense related Federal Employment actually ROSE under Clinton when you look at the numbers from 2,072,919 to 2,204,318"

Sorry dude, non-defense full-time employees dropped from 1,802,981 to 1,750,673.

There was a rise of ~200,000 employees in the part-time category: all the rise was in the "Other and Unallocable", so I'm gonna guess that the number of part-time employees is not expressed as FTEs.

Posted by: Urinated State of America on March 23, 2006 at 11:15 AM | PERMALINK

For what it's worth...

Also on the OCLC site is this factoid:

How far down the OCLC Top 1000 list do you have to go to get to a live author?
Jim Davis' Garfield is number 15 on the list. (Four of the 5 top works by living authors are cartoons!)

And in case you're wondering, Harper Lee's To Kill A Mockingbird is the highest-ranking work by a living female author. It ranked 146.

Posted by: JJF on March 23, 2006 at 11:16 AM | PERMALINK

The fact that there are no conservative titles in the top tier speaks volumes of the liberal bias of our nation's library system.

If more people had access to Coulter, Hannity, and others, there'd be less liberal tripe to deal with and more action towards restoring this country to its true conservative roots.

Posted by: Al on March 23, 2006 at 11:24 AM | PERMALINK

Ron Beyers wrote: An electronic video game called Dance, Dance Revolution and played on a gamepad. Wow.

When I was young dancing was foreplay. Literally. People went dancing as a precurser to sex. If they didn't have a partner when the walked into the dance hall, they would meet potential sex partners on the dance floor. All the moving close to each other, the sound of the music, the whole damn thing. Ballroom dancing in particular has always had a highly sexual context.

Some technological changes don't improve life.

I enjoy DDR, although I am nowhere as good at is as the kids who play it, so I'll step up to defend it. First off, as I mentioned, anyone who plays DDR with the gamepad is unclear on the concept, period, full stop.

I don't think the people who play DDR use it as a substitute to going out dancing, although I'd guess that, since it's popular among young people, some enthusiasts may be too young to get into clubs or places to dance. They're being as social as any bunch of kids in an arcade, and I spent too much time in them in my own youth to knock them for it. And like I said, at least it's good exercise.

Now, for me, what's kinda creepy is seeing a crowd of kids all imitating the body and hand moves, in unison, of someone playing ParaParaParadise. But it's all fun, so why not?

Posted by: Gregory on March 23, 2006 at 11:27 AM | PERMALINK
The fact that there are no conservative titles in the top tier speaks volumes of the liberal bias of our nation's library system.

See, even Al knows the Bible is liberal.

Posted by: cmdicely on March 23, 2006 at 11:30 AM | PERMALINK

I forgot to add:

Besides, and speaking of the apocalypse, if you look at the complaints about young people freak dancing, I'd say many young people are well aware of the dance-as-foreplay concept. ;)

Posted by: Gregory on March 23, 2006 at 11:30 AM | PERMALINK

Yeah, but that's because I studied Old English. Funnily enough, my introduction to the story was the epic prog rock track 'Grendel', by Marillion. 17 odd minutes, told from the point of view of ol' One Arm himself. Posted by: floopmeister

Prog rock . . . Oh gawd.

I've got a novel for you two, Floop and Bob, The Rotter's Club by Jonathan Coe. http://www.powells.com/review/2002_04_02.html

Set in the UK. Not entirely about prog, but begins in the mid-70s with one character supposedly going on to work for the NME, and catching early Clash show when they were still playing clubs in London.

Posted by: Jeff II on March 23, 2006 at 11:32 AM | PERMALINK

"Garfield At Large" is not #15, that ranking counts ALL Garfield books, of which there are quite a few!

Posted by: celia on March 23, 2006 at 11:39 AM | PERMALINK

Jeff II:

i'll have to scope it (though I can't say I'm all that enamored of either The Clash or NME).

But The Rotters Club, by Hatfield and the North, is the name of one of my all-time top 5 (hell, top 3) favorite rock albums.

Your Majesty Is Like a Cream Donut (loud)

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 11:45 AM | PERMALINK

i'll have to scope it (though I can't say I'm all that enamored of either The Clash or NME).

What . . . the . . . hell . . . do . . . you . . . mean . . . by . . . that? Not "enamored of . . . the Clash"? You some sort of William F. Buckley crypto-fascist? The best band of the last thirty years!

But The Rotters Club, by Hatfield and the North, is the name of one of my all-time top 5 (hell, top 3) favorite rock albums.

Hatfield and the North come in for a proper reaming in the book. Say no more, say no more!

Your Majesty Is Like a Cream Donut (loud)
Bob Posted by: rmck1

No he's not. He's like a stream of bat's piss!

Posted by: Jeff II on March 23, 2006 at 11:59 AM | PERMALINK

What . . . the . . . hell . . . do . . . you . . . mean . . . by . . . that? Not "enamored of . . . the Clash"? You some sort of William F. Buckley crypto-fascist? The best band of the last thirty years!

Word. The Only Band That Matters!

Posted by: Gregory on March 23, 2006 at 12:02 PM | PERMALINK

JefII and Gregory did my pro-Clash spluttering for me. Thanks, boys.

Posted by: shortstop on March 23, 2006 at 12:07 PM | PERMALINK

...although I wouldn't say they were the only band that mattered. But I realize Gregory was going for effect there.

Posted by: shortstop on March 23, 2006 at 12:08 PM | PERMALINK

Jeff II:

Hatfield and the North "come in for a proper reaming"?

And this is what ... a book *recommendation*?

The Clash were highly pedestrian, from an era of music where not knowing how to play one's instrument was considered a sign of genius.

Like most first-generation punk (and unlike the best progrock), their music really *dosent* stand the test of time (with the notable and rare exceptions of Rockin' The Casbah and maybe Death Or Glory).

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:13 PM | PERMALINK

...although I wouldn't say they were the only band that mattered. But I realize Gregory was going for effect there.

Naw, just quoting the band's slogan.

Bob, with all due respect, if you think the Clash couldn't play their instruments, you obviously have never listened to "London Calling." I highly recommend the experience. It's one of my favorite albums, and I would argue does indeed stand the test of time.

Posted by: Gregory on March 23, 2006 at 12:17 PM | PERMALINK

Jeff II:

There's an entire calcified orthodoxy of prog-bashing that arose in the punk era (and exemplified in the NME). If Jonathan Coe is spinning a novel with a protag who serves at its mouthpiece, I would assuredly find the book insufferable.

Frank Zappa had a 10-year flamewar with those yobs.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:17 PM | PERMALINK

"Rock the Casbah" (the correct name) is the pure tourist version of the Clash. A very telling post.

CFShep: I meant lending recordings (as opposed to sheet music) was a big piece of library trade. Sorry if that wasn't clear.

Posted by: shortstop on March 23, 2006 at 12:19 PM | PERMALINK

Gregory:

I know London Calling inside and out. I used to play bass on the title track with post-highschool friends.

It's okay for what it is ...

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:20 PM | PERMALINK

shortstop:

Listening to The Clash is like vacationing in a third-world country.

Sometimes the tourist spots are the only ones worth visiting.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:21 PM | PERMALINK

Ah, Gregory, I'd forgotten that slogan, thanks.

Of course they stand the test of time, and LC is probably among the best five albums (can I still use that word if that's the format I originally bought it in?) ever. To deny both their staying power and their influence is fairly silly.

Posted by: shortstop on March 23, 2006 at 12:22 PM | PERMALINK

Are we back in high school yet?

Trying to sell Joe Strummer and Paul Simenon to a Frank Zappa fan is probably about as productive an endeavor now as it was then. I'll leave it to you boys, as duty calls.

Posted by: shortstop on March 23, 2006 at 12:25 PM | PERMALINK

shortstop:

Nobody is denying the staying power of rock critic orthodoxy or the hegemony of "classic rock" radio.

Jesus, it's like listening to Republicans defend Bush because he won elections ...

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:26 PM | PERMALINK

Okay okay okay ... it really *isn't* highschool anymore, and I don't want to get into a musical flamewar with my righteous compadres Jeff II, shortstop and Gregory.

I guess my dander went up when Jeff took a gratuitous swipe at Hatfield and the North ("a proper reaming"), which, dollars to donuts he's never even heard (disabuse me of that notion if it's false, Jeff). H&TN wrote music of Mozartian elegance and harmonic scope -- and imitated no one in the process.

I certainly don't hate The Clash qua The Clash. The were no doubt the most important band of first-generation English punk, and their politics were righteous. In that context, the sobriquet "The Only Band That Mtters" is well-taken. I like a couple songs off Sandinista, too.

But that period of music made me furious because punk rock sucked all the oxygen from progrock and then blamed progrock for what late 70s global recession/stagflation did to the music industry when its politics should have known better.

Progrock didn't die because was, you know, pretentious (although a lot of it certainly was), or that its fans rejected refined complexity in favor of three chord nihilism. Prog died because the music industry could no longer afford loss leaders or take chances on talented bands who might not sell lots and lots of records.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 12:59 PM | PERMALINK

Listening to The Clash is like vacationing in a third-world country.

There's no accounting for taste.

OK?

How about "That's Entertainment" (correct title?) by The Jam?

Posted by: obscure on March 23, 2006 at 1:00 PM | PERMALINK

"Like most first-generation punk (and unlike the best progrock), their music really *dosent* stand the test of time"

Oh balls. Early Genesis and even King Crimson sound as dated as a blaxplotian flick. Pink Floyd's psycheldic-era stuff on Relics sounds fresher than the plodding 1970s-era stuff.

Contrast with The Clash, The Sex Pistol's "Never Mind the Bollocks", the Dead Kennedys, or for that matter Joy Division's first album. Anger, for some reason, ages better than pomposity.

(And, yeah, I have four Marillion albums, including a picture disc of 'Fugazi')

"There's an entire calcified orthodoxy of prog-bashing that arose in the punk era (and exemplified in the NME)."

Sometimes orthodoxy arises for a good reason.

Posted by: Urinated State of America on March 23, 2006 at 1:01 PM | PERMALINK

Oooh, ooh!

I recently read 'Sir Gawain & the Green Knight.'

Pretty damn cool.

Posted by: obscure on March 23, 2006 at 1:02 PM | PERMALINK

USA:

And sometimes orthodoxy arises because of power-conscious institutions like the Catholic Church -- or the Republican Party.

King Crimson before Bruford and Wetton joined the band -- agreed. Larks Tongues in Aspic, is, however, a masterpiece. And how a Marillion fan could dis early Genesis (after Steve Hackett and Phil Collins joined) is an utter mystery, because Marillion owes so much of their mellotron-saturated style to them.

Pink Floyd is the most overrated band in the known universe -- pre and post Alan Parsons. You think their psychedelic stuff is fresh? Ever listen to their good buddies The Soft Machine?

Pychedelic Pink Floyd *defines* "plodding 70s-era stuff." Speaking of bands that, you know, could have done with a couple more hours of finger exercises and ear training.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 1:13 PM | PERMALINK

USA:

Anger's a fine emotion -- but *rage* is inarticulate and rarely in itself makes for good art. A toddler smearing feces on the wall is usually not the world's next Marcel Duchamp.

You've apparently bought the NME propaganda line -- conflating the insufferable pomposity of all late 70s corporate rock with progrock.

Pomposity alone is worthless. Pomposity is amply forgivable when admixed with talent and imagination.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 1:21 PM | PERMALINK

Go into a meeting for an hour, and look at all the fun I missed!

Bob, with all due respect, if you think the Clash couldn't play their instruments, you obviously have never listened to "London Calling." I highly recommend the experience. It's one of my favorite albums, and I would argue does indeed stand the test of time. Posted by: Gregory

Joe Strummer, may he rest in peace, would be the first person to admit that he wasn't a great guitar player or that he had anything but a crappy voice. Paul Simonon learned to play the bass as the band moved forward, and was actually quite accomplished by the time he and Strummer called it a day in 1983(?).

However, Mick Jones is an outstanding guitar player, perhaps my favorite of all time, and an equally accomplished producer (most of the tasty bits on LC were his after hours tweaking), and Nicky "Topper" Headon wasn't called "the human metronome" for nothing. He could (not so much any longer, unfortunately) play anything. I am a drummer, so I think this opinion counts for something. He and Pete Thomas of the Attractions, are, hands down, the two best drummer of their generation, and two of the best I've ever heard.

I still listen frequently to Give 'Em Enough Rope (primarily for "Stay Free" and "Julie's In The Drug Squad") and London Calling.

Bob, The Rotter's Club is not about prog rock or the NME. They are both just parts of the story. However, if you do still genuflect at the alter of Hatfield and the North, you might want to give the book a pass.

Oh, and BTW, fuck Bush.

Posted by: Jeff II on March 23, 2006 at 1:54 PM | PERMALINK

Jeff II:

Well, we're probably going to disagree on Topper Headon, unless you want to bracket off punk and new wave from the rest of music. Maybe those two were stellar in those genres, but those genres (especially where rhythm is concerned) are quite limited.

Anybody can be a "human metronome." To me, being a top-drawer drummer includes at least a passing acquaintence with jazz and the ability to play convincingly in assymmetrical and shifting time signatures. For sheer technical agility, Bill Bruford blows virtually every rock drummer off the planet, although Pip Pyle, Chris Cutler, John "Drumbo" French, Chad Wackerman, Vinnie Coliuta, Phil Collins (especially with Brand X), Christian Vander, Neil Peart, Terry Bozzio and innumerable jazz rockers come perilously close. All of them added something more to the music than 4/4 timekeeping.

USA:

You know, I'm going to have to revisit your calumny on early Genesis as "dated as a blaxploitation flick" because it's astoundingly untrue. Genesis' first mature period, from Nursery Cryme to The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway, is probably the most currently listenable progrock from that entire era. But don't take my word for it. Back in the BBS era, I met a bunch of local guys 20 years younger than I and we bonded over music and politics. I've played them my entire progrock collection, which now comprises the backbones of their CD collections. Early Genesis is the band we keep coming back to, drinking beer, discussing Kant and Heidegger and singing the lyrics off-key near at the top of our lungs. And when these guys got Napster they branched way off into early 80s New Wave (along with Bartok, Stravinsky and Coltrane) which I still have a problem with, but hey :)

In fact, there's a French Canadian Genesis cover band, The Musical Box, that does (with Genesis' approval) note-for-note performances of Genesis shows. My good bud saw them in Manhattan doing The Lamb and says it's the best concert he's ever seen ...

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 3:10 PM | PERMALINK

Jeff II:

Well, we're probably going to disagree on Topper Headon, unless you want to bracket off punk and new wave from the rest of music. Maybe those two were stellar in those genres, but those genres (especially where rhythm is concerned) are quite limited.

Anybody can be a "human metronome." To me, being a top-drawer drummer includes at least a passing acquaintence with jazz and the ability to play convincingly in assymmetrical and shifting time signatures.

Bob, as they say in the military and at WH press conferences, with all due respect, you don't know dick about the Clash and Topper Headon, and, your claims to knowing the bass line to "London Calling" notwithstanding, you apparently have never listened to the album, or Sandinista, all the way through. Neither one are "punk" albums, but are all over the musical map - ska, reggae, jazz, funk, rockabilly, etc, etc.

Topper Headon was a jazz drummer before he came to the Clash, and that's all he plays now. He'd also played in funk bands. The point about being so rock solid is that he could play anything you asked him. If you have listened to LC and Sandinista, and don't understand this, then you weren't listening.

Posted by: Jeff II on March 23, 2006 at 3:26 PM | PERMALINK

Jeff II:

"ska, reggae, funk, rockabilly" doesn't exactly represent a wide pallette of genres. And I have listend to both those discs, and there is nothing remotely resembling "jazz" as, say, Billy Cobham might understand it. I'm not saying the guy wasn't a good musician -- only that there are lots of them out there who play in styles which are much more diverse and demanding than what The Clash required.

Did The Clash ever do anything in an odd meter? Not to my knowledge, but maybe you can enlighten me ...

You want to hear a true melange of styles -- jazz scat, funk, thrash, hip-hop, death metal, bebop, progrock -- and played both impeccably and truly on the edge, check out Dave Fiuczynski's Black Rock Coalition band The Screaming Headless Torsos.

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 3:42 PM | PERMALINK

Vinnie's lookin' for a band
Jazz funk thrash rock
With distortion on, distortion off
The moving grooving grinding cruisin' dissidence

12-tone beat, atonal heat, nonsense chords that always meet
You got it right, got it wrong
Sorry, I'll pass your number on

[chorus]

Vinnie's lookin' for the Pepper sound
Still red-hot but heavier bound
Brainchild of pubescent psalms

Vinnie's lookin' for the Pepper sound
Sill red-hot but heaver bound
Shoenberg over hairy palms

It's fine to mix the music but please do not abuse it
Cuz the groove is Black so don't get whack on me
It's fine to be selective and see it all collective
But you've got to leave the credit where it be

It's fine to mix the music but please do not abuse it
Cuz the groove is Black so don't go whack on you
It's fine to be selective and see it all collective
But you've got to give the credit where it's due

Thank you funk
Thank you rock (2x)

Brother's lookin' for a band
Can be a real pain in the butt
You waste a lotta time, meet a lotta nuts
Like Vinnie, the meatball, he was a real eat-all
He couldn't or woudn't express his quest
He used the best hype terminology
But to me that's all cornyology
C'mon, make a stand, bring your own plan
Be yourself -- or let it go

[chorus 2x, out]

--Dave Fiuczynski

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 4:24 PM | PERMALINK

Personally I'd rather listen to Debbie Boone, or have weasels rip my flesh, than listen to Zappa or progressive rock.


Mental illness as the origin of jazz,

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/1430337.stm

Posted by: cld on March 23, 2006 at 6:35 PM | PERMALINK

cld:

Of course, as the article noted, that hardly takes away from Buddy Bolden's incredible talent.

But hey ... if prog didn't have its virulent detractors (in the name of Debbie Boone?), it wouldn't be nearly as much fun, now would it :)

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 6:46 PM | PERMALINK

Just that the article suggested a reason why most jazz and progressive rock leaves me feeling deranged.


Hilarious story about losing my virginity involving progressive rock, but you really had to be there.

You see, this girl, and her boyfriend, who was this monstrous guy from Columbia who was about 30, whose father was the head of security at the Columbian embassy, or so he'd told her, anyway, and . . .no, I don't even want to try and describe it. But it was the first time I ever took acid and. . .she had this tape of all her favorite Yes music interspersed with unrelevent tracks from this country singer she was enamored of, and somehow The Residents were involved, and --it all ended up rather like The Shining with being locked in a store room and this maniac stalking around outside yelling at us.

A few days later she said to me, "I don't know how you stayed so calm. You looked like you were seeing an angel."

So that's my progressive rock story.

Posted by: cld on March 23, 2006 at 7:37 PM | PERMALINK

cld:

Waitaminute ...

The first time you got laid involved being locked in a storeroom while this girl's *boyfriend* was stalking around outside making threats?

While you were ... what ... having sex?

And losing your cherry with *acid*, to boot?

Man, that would have upset *my* concentration, for sure. To say the least.

Hey look, I like progrock more than a wee bit, but I dunno if I exactly would have wanted to have been there -- even to get the skinny on what sounds like a truly bizarre story.

Something to tell the grandkids, I guess :)

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 8:14 PM | PERMALINK

Bruce Springsteen's dressing room requirements,

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/backstagetour/bruce/bruce5.html

Posted by: cld on March 23, 2006 at 8:17 PM | PERMALINK

That was probably even less funny when it happened than I was trying to remember it as today.

But getting locked in the store room happened afterwards, about 3 am, where we were hiding because he'd gotten into more than a little cocaine.

I'm actually not clear on how the door got locked, because there was somebody else there trying to cool him off.

Posted by: cld on March 23, 2006 at 8:49 PM | PERMALINK

cld:

But you basically cuckolded this guy ... gahhh, did you maintain any kind of relationship with this girl afterwards?

I mean ... she might have been quite lovely to pop your cherry with (though I think I'd prefer that experience while not on hallucinogens), but she doesn't exactly sound like girlfriend material if she showed up as this guy's gf and wound up fucking you the same night ...

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 9:11 PM | PERMALINK

Well, that was fun!

In the next thread I think I'll drop a reference to early Dylan and start an acoustic versus amplified flame war...

;)

Posted by: floopmeister on March 23, 2006 at 9:27 PM | PERMALINK

No, I understand she moved out of the country thereafter, and, for all I know, is now the Pope's mistress.

Posted by: cld on March 23, 2006 at 9:30 PM | PERMALINK

cld:

Well, better than than Berlusconi's :)

floop:

Hey man, just don't diss Hatfield and the North and we'll get along *just fine*.

:)

Bob

Posted by: rmck1 on March 23, 2006 at 10:40 PM | PERMALINK

I dunno, have you seen the Pope?

http://img122.imageshack.us/img122/1697/popeinasantahatdec056ro.jpg

Posted by: cld on March 23, 2006 at 11:02 PM | PERMALINK

You know, the alma mater of the Anal Intruder(TM) fine family of graduated butt spindles.
.

Posted by: Butt Spindle University on March 24, 2006 at 5:46 AM | PERMALINK




 

 

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