You know, Kevin. These are just the kinds of questions I used to answer back in the day when we'd use double-album covers to clean out the seeds and roll fresh j's from a fresh lid. Ummmm, creamy peanut butter.

i'll guess...

Why is smooth peanut butter cheaper than nutty?

because nutty is smooth with nuts added later.

How clean is bar soap in a public bathroom?

as clean as any other used bar of soap. it just has a mixture of many people's germs, instead of just one family's.

whoever is not against us is for us

He meant to ask: "What comes after 999,999,999,999,999?"

The answer is "1 quadrillion." In increasing order, there's (in America) a million, a billion, a trillion, a quadrillion, a quintillion, a sextillion, a septillion, then an octillion. I don't know what comes after that.

Do dolphins actually save people? If so, why do they do this?

The DOD hired a dolphin sociologist to learn about their culture in order to manipulate them into behaviors that are not in their best self interest. And saving people is not in a dolphin's best interest.

Kevin writes: "Engber says he'll answer one of these questions in an upcoming column, but carefully doesn't promise to answer the one that gets the most votes"

Enger writes: "The question that gets the most reader votes will be addressed in an upcoming Explainer column."

Kevin writes: "Engber says he'll answer one of these questions in an upcoming column, but carefully doesn't promise to answer the one that gets the most votes. Smart man."

Engber writes: "The question that gets the most reader votes will be addressed in an upcoming Explainer column."

Smooth and nutty are the same price at Trader Joe's.

And I'll bet all the theories assume a tragedy of the commons, with tradeable property rights as the only solution.

...(in America) a million, a billion, a trillion, a quadrillion, a quintillion, a sextillion, a septillion, then an octillion. I don't know what comes after that. Posted by: Blake Hegerle on December 20, 2006 at 5:33 PM

Is that where the federal deficit is now???

Can a state in the United States split into two or more states? If so, how? I think Texas has a special provision for being able to divide into up to five states. But I am wondering about the others.

I'm surprised Tom Delay didn't think of that one when he was trying to rig congress.. Just imagine, 8 more republican senators, too! Ugh!

Thanks,

Mike

of course you've heard the one about Bush aksing how many million is a Brazilian

What would happen to the stock market if a meteor impacted the earth? What would happen to the global markets and the U.S. market? Say a meteor hits inside U.S. borders and takes out two states.

Am I the only one who doesn't get why this is a question? Any meteor that can take out two states is a huge meteor that will likely wipe out earth as we know it. Which, in turn, will wipe out the global markets and US market. I mean, even being charitable and assuming Connecticut and Rhode Island or Delaware and Maryland were wiped off the map, that's still a cataclysmic event that humanity is unlikely to survive from. I thought the meteor movie craze of 1998 educated the public on this.

The No. 8 at Los Garcias in Kailua, Oahu is actually your choice of any two of the following: chile relleno, taco (beef, chicken or chili verde), enchilada (cheese, chicken, or beef), or burrito (bean, beef, chicken, or chili verde) -- and served with the obligatory rice and beans, of course.

In school, I was told there were no stupid questions. Maybe it's time to start questioning that conventional wisdom?

>> What would happen to the stock market if a meteor
>> impacted the earth? What would happen to the
>> global markets and the U.S. market? Say a meteor
>> hits inside U.S. borders and takes out two states.

>> Am I the only one who doesn't get why this is a question?

Yes. If you read the article, you'll see that Engber did not limit the candidate questions to those that made sense.

Kerkira

assuming Connecticut and Rhode Island or Delaware and Maryland were wiped off the map, that's still a cataclysmic event that humanity is unlikely to survive from.

New Orleans' demise did not exactly disturb humanity or even change the economic system that caused its flooding.

Blake Hegerle: "In increasing order, there's (in America) a million, a billion, a trillion, a quadrillion, a quintillion, a sextillion, a septillion, then an octillion. I don't know what comes after that."

Gazillion?

A study was done to test whether of not dolphins saved people. It turns out that dolphins are curious and push people they find in the water in random directions. There is a massive selection bias here because we only hear from those who live.

No, you idiots. The "republican budget deficit" comes after "octillion". What a bunch of bozos!!!

A study was done to test whether of not dolphins saved people. It turns out that dolphins are curious and push people they find in the water in random directions. There is a massive selection bias here because we only hear from those who live.

Whahahah!! That's funny, but clearly true.

Those who the dolphins ate also did not survive.

After octillion comes nonillion and decillion. Then it just becomes compound word combinations of the aforementioned - undecillion, duodecillion, etc. I would guess creamy peanut butter is cheaper because they simply blend (puree) peanuts and no mixing occurs. Any manufacturing process is made more complex (and costly) when you have to blend or mix things together, in this case, blended and diced peanuts. Do dolphins save people? I'm not sure this is science as much as folklore. How do you test it?

What are the other questions? I am on a Treo and can't go back and read the post without losing my comment. Oh well.

After octillion comes nonillion and decillion.

So how much is in a "shit load"?

Somebody still reads Slate?!?!

You prove me wrong, Hostile. Obviously, the effects of a large meteor strike on the Earth's surface are not as common knowledge as I assumed.

Its not that we'd be without two states, is that those two states would now be clouding the atmosphere and killing off most plant life. That would be a far larger impact event than what is speculated to have led to the extinction of the dinosaurs. It wouldn't be that we'd miss our friends in New Haven. Its that the aftermath would result in mass extinctions across the planet. A meteor strike taking out a large city could well be enough to radically effect the planet.

Why do humans die so young? In biblical times, people lived for several hundred years; now living to 100 is considered a long life. What happened?

Because the people who wrote the bible were lying. Doh!

Of course dolphins save people, they are liberal (they do live in a very blue state)

The Baptists have to be up there on the $-o-meter. I used to live in Houston and the second baptist church, beyond being larger than the astrodome, looked like the sales lot for a Cadillac dealership

coyote: "I used to live in Houston and the second baptist church, beyond being larger than the astrodome, looked like the sales lot for a Cadillac dealership."

That's only because, contrary to popular Catholic doctrine, Jesus entered Jerusalem on Palm Sunday driving a '75 burgundy-colored Eldorado.

Why is the No. 8 always the same combination (tamale, enchilada, rice, beans) in any Mexican restaurant I visit?

9/11

Can a state in the United States split into two or more states?

Yes.

If so, how?

Through a vote of Congress to admit the new state formed from part of the existing state with the consent of the legislature of the (unified, pre-split) state. See Article IV, Section 3, of the U.S. Constitution.

BStu: "A meteor strike taking out a large city could well be enough to radically effect the planet."

All the more reason we need to immediately fund George Bush's manned mission to Mars and his moon base.

New Orleans' demise did not exactly disturb humanity or even change the economic system that caused its flooding.
New Orlean's demise didn't come from a two-state sized meteorite striking the Earth.

Well played, cmdicely. Now, to ask Daniel Engber a few more questions:

(1) Exactly how does one go about giving Texas back to Mexico?

(2) If the Mexicans agreed to take Texas back, could we insist that the Bush family is part of a package deal?

(3) How much would it cost to buy Baja California?

Are you going to post the hard trivia year-end quiz from that UK college like you did last year? That was fun...

New Orlean's demise didn't come from a two-state sized meteorite striking the Earth.
A meteor strike that takes out two states is vastly different from the strike of two-state-sized meteor. The latter is likely to break the Earth, clean in two. Unless, of course, the two states in question are Rhode Island and Rhode Island.

The Catholic Church surely must own more real estate than any other religion- or any other organization.

From the BBC:
Dolphins off the northern New Zealand coast are being credited with saving a group of swimmers from a great white shark.
The swimmers say the mammals formed a ring around them, which repelled the three-metre shark. Nick Serpell reports.

"NO's demise didn't come from a two-state sized
meteorite stiking the Earth"

And if it had, Shrub and crew would have handled it differently? Shrub would have arisen on the third day and done what? And they would care about re-building? How? And the Corps of Engineers would have suddenly developed brains and concern for their fellow citizens in exactly what manner?

Can Texas Divide? http://www.tsl.state.tx.us/exhibits/annexation/part5/question7.html

Dear Mr. Engber:

What is in those photographs of Katherine Graham, Charlie Peters, Marty Peretz, Michael Kinsley and Jacob Weisberg that keeps Mickey Kaus employed?

Donald from Hawaii:(2) If the Mexicans agreed to take Texas back, could we insist that the Bush family is part of a package deal?

(3) How much would it cost to buy Baja California?

I suggest an even trade.

For sure this one (I've been wondering myself):

yea i have my own 620 gang and i dont know how to run it to make not look like a little bitch gang joke it is just me and my friend how do i run it?

This is a great question. Does one go the 503(c) route with a 620 gang? Or does that make one look like a bitch to one's peer 620s?

Donald,

Is No. 8 at Cisco's the same as at Los Garcias, the same as in Southern California, or something else entirely? And why are there as many decent Mexican restaurants in Kailua as there are in the entire area from Waikiki to downtown?

The No. 8 at Los Garcias in Kailua, Oahu is actually your choice of any two of the following: chile relleno, taco (beef, chicken or chili verde), enchilada (cheese, chicken, or beef), or burrito (bean, beef, chicken, or chili verde)
Posted by: Donald from Hawaii on December 20, 2006 at 5:56 PM |

A quick trip to safeway.com shows crunchy and smooth peanut butter are the same price.

Did you know that "gullible" isn't in the dictionary?

"What is the richest religion? Scientology has a lot of Hollywood stars and I think they actually make their members give money, but Catholicism is a very old religion with its own country. Also, Islam has a lot of members but I don't know about their money situation."

Good grief. Is this your elaboration, Mr. Drum, or "The Explainer's"? Do either or both of you really truly not know that there is no Islamic "church," just like there is no Jewish "church" in the sense of a huge, worldwide institutional structure that administers the religion, so to speak?

If the question is how much comparative wealth Muslims or Jews or Christians *cumulatively* have, that's one thing. But there is nothing in Islam or in Judaism that has any parallel to the centralized, hierarchical, institutionalized Catholic Church, or the Episcopal Church or Scientology or the Mormon church, etc. Islam doesn't even officially ordain its clergy.

Boy, World Religions 101, for Pete's sake.

Something’s Fishy About Political Correctness
( cognitorex blogspot )

If one allometrically scales the taxon mammals for encephalization quotient the results indicate that man and the porpoise are most equal. This affinity alone could explain why porpoises might save humans.
Also, whales, followed by elephants, rank highest in brain size surpassing the three-pound brain weight of man and porpoise.
These facts once led me to a complete teleological construct for the animal kingdom, plants included, and the universe.
Simply stated, plants and man, each of carbon and water, seek similar corporal and spiritual nourishment and the “big brains” speak or sing their love of God (generic).
It was a beautiful theory. All spirituality, all existence, gloriously, harmoniously, and ever so upliftingly encapsulated. Man and plants together turn to the sun and the hauntingly beautiful whale songs were psalms to God, hymns to the infinite.
Then I found out that female whales can’t or don’t or aren’t allowed to sing.
What a God damn bummer that was.

gyrfalcon:

These were questions mailed in by Slate readers and quoted (one presumes) verbatim. The idea here is to air a little snark at the, umm, stone idiocy of some of the people who ask these questions ...

I especially liked the question about forced masturbation :)

Bob

The questions I actually see Explained are the ones related to recent news stories.

The forced masturbation question was the only one I recognized from a recent news story, namely, Abu Ghraib.

Hostile,

Does the dolphin sociologist have a dock-torate?

Just imagine if you were to task yourself with making up the nuttiest question that you could, to punk the answer man. Do you think you could come up with any thing close to these?

keith: "Is No. 8 at Cisco's the same as at Los Garcias, the same as in Southern California, or something else entirely? And why are there as many decent Mexican restaurants in Kailua as there are in the entire area from Waikiki to downtown? "

I haven't been to Cisco's since the owner sold it after her husband died a couple of years ago. I lived in Kailua and worked at Buzz's Lanikai in the 1980s, and have many fond memories about hanging out with friends after work at Cisco's, Sylvester's and Fast Eddie's that I'd like to leave intact.

Mexico Lindo, which is near Times's on Kailua Road (across the street from Macy's), is also pretty good.

I've never been able to figure out why Kailua has consistently had more good Mexican restaurants than the rest of Oahu. But it seems to be getting better elsewhere -- have you checked out Diego's Taqueria next to Old Stadium Park in Moiliili, or Cholo's in Haleiwa?

Why is there no blue food? Blueberrys don't count. They're purple.

Duh, nutty peanut butter is more expensive because adding the chunks of nuts back in is an extra step.

As I'm certain plenty of people pointed out above.

And dolphins save people just to fuck with sociologist's minds. Obviously. Oh, and to make Peggy Noonan swoon. They think she's funny.

Peanuts cost more than partially hydrogenated vegetable oil.

Dolphins have been known to try to save mattresses. Either they aren't very discriminating, or it is really tough to get a good nights sleep out in the ocean.

"Lasers are now powerful and small (at least I think they are), so why don't our troops carry laser guns?"
Because your initial, implicit premise is false. Also because of dust in the air and the fact that guns don't give away the position of a shooter (since the invention of smokeless powder).

The Catholic church.

I'll approach the smooth vs chunky from a different angle:

If you start out with peanuts - by definition chunky - and start to puree them to make them smooth, you can simply stop sooner to make chunky.
This saves energy ergo, chunky is cheaper. QED

Both types of PB are the same at Whole Foods.

Great crack about a "shit load" biggest!

How many public restrooms still have bar soap? Nowadays, it is mostly that semen-like stuff.

Why is smooth peanut butter cheaper than nutty?

Because you're replacing some volume of regular peanut butter which contains a high proportion of hydrogenated vegetable fat (cheap) with chunks of actual peanuts (relatively less cheap) also employing an additional manufacturing phase and additional equipment (choppers, hoppers and mixers).

You've also then got a second batch of labels (printing costs) and a separate line filling and labeling chunky.

There are inventory costs and warehousing costs associated with carrying two kinds of anything instead of one. Distributional costs.

There are lots of reasonable explanations if you have a background which includes cost accounting in a manufacturing background.

(Inventory Control Analyst for a manufacturer (since defunct after a disastrous merger with LTV) of oil field drilling equipment in my case.)

Why is the No. 8 always the same combination (tamale, enchilada, rice, beans) in any Mexican restaurant I visit? This includes primarily the southeast United States but not obvious franchises.

Because they're all getting their menus in bulk from the same people.

Look at Chinese restaurant menus.

Salesman comes with a big book. Owner chooses whichever template he likes best because it, maybe, has the coolest dragons (Aztec-y maidens in the case of Mexican places) or whatever.

You'll even see the same misspellings carried forward decade to decade.

Sharks attack dolphins regularly, so the New Zealand example could be dolphins piss off sharks instead of dolphins save humans.

Has anybody been rescued after being pushed in a non-helpful direction by dolphins?

Oh, and something you learn in Intro to Business:

Because the consumer has proven willing pay more for chunky...otherwise they'd distribute the additional costs evenly over both varieties and price them the same.

Well, I noticed in Samoa that "smooth" was more labor intensive because of the number of locals needed to walk and dance atop the nuts - However, as it was part of a mating ritual, the dancers were all volunteers, so there was not cost to be passed on.

Soap is made of lye. Drano is made of lye, just more concentrated. Germs, anyone?

Production costs for creamy or chunky may be higher or lower, but the margin between cost & retail price is sufficient to price everything the same. Don't think of peanut butter, think of binoculars. Bino prices increase as power increases. The only difference between 7x50's & 10x50's is the eyepiece. As power goes up, eyepiece diameter goes down. The smaller they are, the more they cost: Price based on perception.

Dolphins save people because they like us. Dogs save people because they like us. Cats are divided. People sometimes save each other. Nothing to do with brain size.

Yes, dolphins really save people, but I've never seen any coherent theory as to why.

Porpoises (dolphins are a species of fish) have developed a capacity for altruism.

We may simply resemble the young of their own species closely enough to trigger this response.

Well, our cousins tried to make nice to the Chinese in the Yangtze, and how did that work out?

Porpoises are marine mammals.

Dolphins are FISH (actually there are 3 or 4 species called 'dolphins' depending on the locality).

No dolphin has ever saved a human being.

Morning, Paul.

Anyone interested in cooperation and altruism can check out:

'Cheating Monkeys and Citizen Bees - The Nature of Cooperation in Animals and Humans' Lee Dugatkin

Perhaps they have been talking at cross porpoises.

Perhaps they have been talking at cross porpoises.
Posted by: Ole Olesen

LOL

I can't remember the last time I saw a bar of soap in a public restroom.

I do wonder about this, however:

1. Use toilet
2. Turn on water at sink with germy hand transfer germs to facuet handle
3. wash hands, cleansing them of germs
4. Turn off water, transferring germs back to hand, along with other people's germs

Conclusion: you're better off just not washing your hands

Conclusion: you're better off just not washing your hands
Posted by: Dan T.

Which is why you increasingly see faucets and toilets which operate on photo-voltaic cells which do not require you to touch anything.

Now about the door handle...

Lave las manos

If the faucet is not a sensor type, use paper towels to not only wipe your hands, but turn off the faucet and open the exit door.

Lave las manos - sung to the tune of "Suddenly Seymour"

I carry an alcohol based 'hand sanitizer' and use it regularly.

Bonus points for 'Little Shop of Horrors' reference.

"Feed me, Seymour!"

MsNThrope gets it wrong about dolphins. Dolphins are cetaceans of the family Delphinidae (ocean dolphins) or Platanistoidea (river dolphins). Porpoises are cetaceans of the family Phocoenidae, and are distinct from dolphins.

The fish known on menus as "mahi-mahi" is also known as "dolphinfish."

A quick trip to safeway.com shows crunchy and smooth peanut butter are the same price.

Did you know that "gullible" isn't in the dictionary?

gullible: A state of being attained when a person rushes to a dictionary to look up "gullible" upon being told that "gullible" is not in said dictionary.

Perhaps. But that's a perfectly valid pricing decision undertaken at the retail level.

There can still be a perfectly valid cost accounting explanation which could be invoked to justify a different price structure based on an analysis of discrete (costs directly attributable to one product) costs.

you're all wrong about the Peanut butter question. Skippy costs more because of conception that it is "better" (even though studies show more people prefer creamy)

It doesn't cost any more to make. It's exactly the same marketing and economic as DVDs vs VHS and CDs vs Cassette tapes. DVDs and CDs are manufactured at a fraction of the cost, but when they came out they cost customers considerably more.

FYI.

If I remember aright, a long time ago 2% milk was cheaper than whole milk, partially because the cream from 2% could be used for other things and offset the cost. Then 2% was more expensive because people would pay more for the health benefits. The last time I went to the market, they were the same price.

I'm a Smucker's girl myself - without the hydrogenated veg oil and all that sugar. Stirring the separated peanut oil back in is a bit of a drag but worth it.

Not to burst any bubbles, but just perused the peanut butter aisle at New Seasons in Portland. Six different brands - No price difference between smooth and chunky.

However, a big difference in price between non-organic and organic brands - And contrary to the idiot rdw, organic may be a scam in other areas of the country, but organic is highly regulated here in Oregon - Organic is far more expensive, but then one must leap through many hoops in order to have anything certified organic in the Northwest. And the sales of organic at New Seasons continue to ring Ka-Ching.

I want a discussion about inaccessable cardinals.

How about GCF?

"gullible: A state of being attained when a person rushes to a dictionary to look up "gullible" upon being told that "gullible" is not in said dictionary."

But looking up the word in the dictionary shows that the person doesn't take your word for it, and therefore is not gullible.

When we are approaching another person, like in a hallway, why do we step to our left? That is, try and pass right-shoulder-to-right-shoulder.

I can answer that one: we don't if "we" are in the US. walking, in the countries I've visited, seems to follow the same conventions as driving.

I have been pondering this situation for as long as I can remember (maybe age 7-8) and it drives me nuts. It makes me feel like my head will implode if I think any harder. Is the universe infinite? It must end somewhere. But when it ends … there must be something on the other side … right?

space is curved, there is no "other side".

Hi, how does nature make water? How does nature combine one oxygen atom and two hydrogen atoms to make water? If we knew how nature makes water, then perhaps we can then find an efficient way of separating hydrogen from oxygen, thus creating the ultimate source for energy.

"nature" uses oxidation, the same way you do it.

and so forth

somebody else take a turn...

I read the following, posted by cmdicely: "Can a state in the United States split into two or more states? Yes. If so, how? Through a vote of Congress to admit the new state formed from part of the existing state with the consent of the legislature of the (unified, pre-split) state. See Article IV, Section 3, of the U.S. Constitution." But it's worth noting -- and here I'm summarizing what I happened to be reading, coincidentally, just this morning, in a book called "Creative Minds in Desperate Times: The Civil War's Most Sensational Schemes and Plots," by Webb Garrison -- that (Unionist) West Virginia was created from Virginia, a state that had voted for secession and that was a Confederate state during the Civil War. Shortly after the vote for secession, a body of delegates, some perhaps self-annointed, created a new state (dubbed "Kanawah")in order to separate themselves from the Confederate separatists. A "Restored Government" was created, a governor and senators were selected, and a state constitution was ratified by voters who swore their allegiance to the U.S. A new state legislature then petitioned Congress for statehood. The U.S. secretary of the navy and postmaster general both felt such an admission as a state would be unconstitional, pricisely because of the Article 4 Section 3 provisions of the U.S. Constitution stipulating that consent of the legislatures of the states concerned was required. (And of course, the Virginia state legislature, still considered bt the federal government to be bound to the union, had done no such thing.) But Congress voted its approval. President Lincoln considered a veto, but ended up signing the bill, which also stipulated the abolishment of slavery in the new state. West Virginia became a state swiftly, without the normal probationary "territorial" phase, thus allowing it to have a near-immediate political impact in terms of presidential,electoral votes, which went to Lincoln in 1864. There were other political and of course military ramifications. All of this should be understood in context: there were distinct and even enormous socio-economic and political differences between the western and eastern portions of Virginia, preceding the war, and few owned slaves in the western parts.

Separate subject: re bathroom soap etc. -- as preparatory steps to limit the impact of a bird flu if/when it strikes, some U.S. school districts and other jurisdictions and authorities are creating "how to wash your hands" instructions, which might seem stoopid but which might save lives, since not everyone knows just how long to scrub etc. -- but in any case, those instructions often conclude with something to the effect of "use a paper towel to open and close the door handle on the way out."

"If the question is how much comparative wealth Muslims or Jews or Christians *cumulatively* have, that's one thing."

My 2 cents:

Since the world's richest and second richest persons are atheists (I don't have a link - google it yourself) I guess that says something about the other half.

Crunchy is more expensive than creamy because any idiot who would want to spread crunchy peanut butter on his bread couldn't possibly be bright (or rational) or price sensitive. :) Well, I don't care for PB, crunchy or creamy. I prefer plain old nuts.

Do dolphins actually save sailors? Well, dolphins just like to push sailors. We hear from the ones they push to shore.