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Tilting at Windmills

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September 22, 2007
By: Kevin Drum

WEEKEND POSER....When you're home alone, do you close the door when you use the bathroom? Please explain your answer to this vital question of national security in 25 words or less.

Kevin Drum 1:12 PM Permalink | Trackbacks | Comments (130)

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No.

Explained: I don't need to.

Posted by: jon on September 22, 2007 at 1:17 PM | PERMALINK

If closing the bathroom door isn't such an ingrained habit that you do it automatically, without thinking about it, you probably have some embarrassments waiting for you in the future.

Posted by: RSA on September 22, 2007 at 1:19 PM | PERMALINK

Well, ever since 9/11, my Glock never leaves my side. Of course, that poor kitty never should have pushed the bathroom door open.

Posted by: stupid git on September 22, 2007 at 1:19 PM | PERMALINK

Yes, I do, because of habit.

Posted by: Boorring on September 22, 2007 at 1:20 PM | PERMALINK

Nobody freak out, but we don't close the door even when we're not alone.

Posted by: craigie on September 22, 2007 at 1:20 PM | PERMALINK

What doors?

Posted by: Marshall on September 22, 2007 at 1:21 PM | PERMALINK

After being creeped out by Psycho as a kid - YES while in the shower - otherwise, no

Posted by: Ethel-to-Tilly on September 22, 2007 at 1:21 PM | PERMALINK

Not all the way, because the dogs get upset (they are convinced that there is a secret back door to the bathroom through which I will escape, and they'll never see me again).

Posted by: jhill on September 22, 2007 at 1:21 PM | PERMALINK

I usually just push the door shut, but don't latch it. Which reminds me of a story . . . .

My brother, his new girlfriend, and me were visiting our parents' house. I was home alone, and everybody else was out drinking.

I was in the bathroom, enjoying a magazine, door shut, when I heard the garage door open. While I was deciding whether get up and lock the door, my brother's girlfriend ran into the house, straight for the bathroom, and pushed the door open, to our mutual horror, even though she should have seen that the light was on. She and my brother broke up soon after, and I never saw her again, thank God.

Posted by: Garamond12 on September 22, 2007 at 1:23 PM | PERMALINK

No

Posted by: Randum on September 22, 2007 at 1:24 PM | PERMALINK

I really don't want to know why you asked this question...

Posted by: Charles on September 22, 2007 at 1:25 PM | PERMALINK

Yes, of course. Morality is doing what's right even when no one is looking.

Posted by: Nonplussed on September 22, 2007 at 1:26 PM | PERMALINK

No.

I suspect there was a "discussion" on this topic in the Drum household this morning.

What happens to posts over 25 words?

Posted by: F. Frederson on September 22, 2007 at 1:26 PM | PERMALINK

Yes, force of habit.

Posted by: Old Hat on September 22, 2007 at 1:28 PM | PERMALINK

If not the bathroom door, then a door between me and everyone else in the house/apartment.

Posted by: Alex on September 22, 2007 at 1:29 PM | PERMALINK

The ventilator fan is blocked when the door is open, so it's "no" for #1 and "yes" for #2.

Posted by: Thlayli on September 22, 2007 at 1:30 PM | PERMALINK

Hell, I don't close the door unless someone who doesn't live here is in the house. The cat doesn't like it when you close that door, her water bowl and cat box are in there, and even if she doesn't have to use them, we should not close that door!

Posted by: bloomingpol on September 22, 2007 at 1:33 PM | PERMALINK

Depends on what I'm doing in there.

Posted by: Blue Girl, Red State (aka G.C.) on September 22, 2007 at 1:34 PM | PERMALINK

No.

Posted by: Goof Beyou on September 22, 2007 at 1:35 PM | PERMALINK

Of course, I shut it, but, that didn't seem to stop Jack from saying "Here's Johnny".

Posted by: Wendy Torrance on September 22, 2007 at 1:38 PM | PERMALINK

what's the point of leaving the door open if you've got no one to show off to?

Posted by: benjoya on September 22, 2007 at 1:39 PM | PERMALINK

"Depends on what I'm doing in there"

As if, that really matters to us.

Posted by: Homeland Security Tech on September 22, 2007 at 1:40 PM | PERMALINK

In this modern world of today...

(Oh, geez. I need another 19 words.)

Posted by: daveb99 on September 22, 2007 at 1:43 PM | PERMALINK

What does "enjoying a magazine" mean exactly, Garamond?

Posted by: fumphis on September 22, 2007 at 1:45 PM | PERMALINK

Did MoveOn.org buy another add to transform our glorius victory in Iraq to an unmitigated disaster?

Posted by: gregor on September 22, 2007 at 1:46 PM | PERMALINK

Of course, I close the door - Need to view all of those Betrayass "Victory Charts" hanging there.

As some poor souls walk the streets, mournfully crying, "Spare change, spare Cubs tickets, spare change".

Posted by: thethirdPaul on September 22, 2007 at 1:51 PM | PERMALINK

Yes. My bathroom faces the front door which is all glass.

Posted by: Fred F. on September 22, 2007 at 1:51 PM | PERMALINK

No -- and even when I'm not alone, my kids don't think anything about coming in anyway.

Posted by: Teresa on September 22, 2007 at 1:56 PM | PERMALINK

No in summer, yes in winter. It's an old house and I need the assist that the door being opened or close will provide for the temperature in the bathroom.

Posted by: sj on September 22, 2007 at 2:04 PM | PERMALINK

I was in a badly designed hotel room once where they had made the bathroom too small and had to remove the bathroom door to compensate. The outer room door was locked and chained and I still felt exposed to the world.

Posted by: Randy on September 22, 2007 at 2:06 PM | PERMALINK

Does alone mean people only? The dog does not like doors being closed; as Mark Twain said, a door is something a dog is always on the wrong side of.

Posted by: TJM on September 22, 2007 at 2:11 PM | PERMALINK

yes and no. depends on the particular function. why the differnce? i don't know.

Posted by: mudwall jackson on September 22, 2007 at 2:12 PM | PERMALINK

That aroma is not theraputic, keeping the door closed keeps it confined.

Posted by: balzar on September 22, 2007 at 2:15 PM | PERMALINK

When you're home alone, do you close the door when you use the bathroom?

Depends(TM)

Posted by: jerry on September 22, 2007 at 2:16 PM | PERMALINK

Typically no, unless I have the curtains open in the next room or something.

Posted by: Greg Sanders on September 22, 2007 at 2:18 PM | PERMALINK

Because if my wife can't see me pee as she walks down the hall then the terrorists have won.

Posted by: NJ on September 22, 2007 at 2:20 PM | PERMALINK

That aroma is not theraputic, keeping the door closed keeps it confined.

Indeed. Home alone or no, I have no desire for the foul odor to permeate the entire household.

Posted by: Xanthippas on September 22, 2007 at 2:21 PM | PERMALINK

Depends on whether or not I'm beating off.

Posted by: Al on September 22, 2007 at 2:22 PM | PERMALINK

#1: Never

#2: Sometimes

#3: Always

Posted by: remrebound on September 22, 2007 at 2:22 PM | PERMALINK

Yes because my bathroom is visible from the front door. I guess if I lived alone, I would not care so much.

Posted by: jstuddle on September 22, 2007 at 2:33 PM | PERMALINK

Yes.

I have incredibly bad-smelling shit, I mean it is totally off the normal scale.

If I don't close the door, it stinks up the whole house for a day at least.

Posted by: moron on September 22, 2007 at 2:36 PM | PERMALINK

Answer: Yes
Why?: 9/11

Posted by: Superking on September 22, 2007 at 2:36 PM | PERMALINK

It is so bad, in fact, I try never to go at work. I suspect it cost me a job years ago.

Posted by: moron on September 22, 2007 at 2:38 PM | PERMALINK

Only when the bedroom window is open, because the shade sometimes flaps in the wind and gives the neighbors a free show of anyone in the master bath.

Nobody freak out, but we don't close the door even when we're not alone.

You know, the social contract really falls apart if people don't shut the door when doing certain things. For winky-tinkying, no prob.

Well, ever since 9/11, my Glock never leaves my side. Of course, that poor kitty never should have pushed the bathroom door open.

Bwa ha ha.

As some poor souls walk the streets, mournfully crying, "Spare change, spare Cubs tickets, spare change".

Shut up! Like you would have forked over $80 per. I'm watching it on WGN.

Posted by: shortstop on September 22, 2007 at 2:40 PM | PERMALINK

Only to keep my two little dogs out, as they insist on accompanying me everywhere.

Posted by: Fiona on September 22, 2007 at 2:46 PM | PERMALINK

No; If I am alone, I already have privacy.

Posted by: lee on September 22, 2007 at 2:49 PM | PERMALINK

winky-tinkying?

Is that what Tinky Winky does?

Posted by: Goof Beyou on September 22, 2007 at 2:54 PM | PERMALINK

Yes.

I live in a household of women. I never know when my wife or daughter might come home.

Posted by: corpus juris on September 22, 2007 at 3:07 PM | PERMALINK

Open. I have to listen for the phone. Seems the only time Al ever calls is when I'm on the pot. It's like he's got a fifth sense for that.

Posted by: junebug on September 22, 2007 at 3:12 PM | PERMALINK

I used to leave it open, but 9/11 changed everything.

Posted by: urkel on September 22, 2007 at 3:13 PM | PERMALINK

Jeez, Kevin.

That question is just asking for Too Much Information.

Thanks loads.

Posted by: frankly0 on September 22, 2007 at 3:15 PM | PERMALINK

One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen Seventeen Eighteen Nineteen Twenty Twenty-one Twenty-two Twenty-three Twenty-four Twenty-five Twenty-six

Doh!!!

Posted by: absent observer on September 22, 2007 at 3:17 PM | PERMALINK

Ignorance was bliss.

Posted by: frankly0 on September 22, 2007 at 3:18 PM | PERMALINK

Yes. My outside doors are normally unlocked and my kids have many friends who roam freely about our house.

Posted by: little ole jim from red country on September 22, 2007 at 3:22 PM | PERMALINK

Whoever heard of an outhouse without a door to keep the varmints out?

Posted by: Michael7843853 G-O/F in 08 on September 22, 2007 at 3:54 PM | PERMALINK

Run out of things to talk about, have we Kevin?

Posted by: pol on September 22, 2007 at 3:55 PM | PERMALINK

no,
we only do when we have guests. It is not necessary for us to internalize this behavior. We have adequate toilet-shame to prevent embarrassments.

Posted by: shoebeacon on September 22, 2007 at 3:57 PM | PERMALINK

Used to. Then we renovated and were without a bathroom door for a month. I'm still not used to the door, and forget it's there. (25!)

Posted by: lurkette on September 22, 2007 at 4:00 PM | PERMALINK

When I was an Episcopalian, I closed it. But now I'm a Baptist, and I leave it open -- to show the surge is working.

Posted by: Econobuzz on September 22, 2007 at 4:01 PM | PERMALINK

No

Posted by: jrodrn on September 22, 2007 at 4:08 PM | PERMALINK

Possibly TMI........I never shut the door unless non-relations are in the house.

Posted by: Stacy on September 22, 2007 at 4:09 PM | PERMALINK

Our toilet's on the porch you insensitive clod!

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1108/576907583_db81440ada.jpg

Posted by: Cletus on September 22, 2007 at 4:22 PM | PERMALINK

I had to laugh at the answer about the dogs think there is a back door to the bathroom that you will sneak out of if the door is shut. That is also my answer!

Posted by: Lunch Lady on September 22, 2007 at 4:23 PM | PERMALINK

Ah, you see I have a bathroom like Archie Bunkers.

Does it have a door? Does it have walls? All I can say is its upstairs.

Posted by: Ya Know... on September 22, 2007 at 4:30 PM | PERMALINK

No.

It just seems logical to leave it open, we close doors for privacy. With no one else home, there is no one to be private from.

Posted by: arteclectic on September 22, 2007 at 4:31 PM | PERMALINK

It depends on how you define alone? Hardee-Har-Har...I miss the good ol' dayz...Bill Clinton was such an great american, president, wordplayer...

Posted by: Hils-The-Greater on September 22, 2007 at 4:36 PM | PERMALINK

Never occurred to me. So,no.

Posted by: monzie on September 22, 2007 at 4:36 PM | PERMALINK

I always close it, then open it 10 seconds later when the cats start crying to get in. It'd be simpler just to leave it open for them, since the cats are in charge anyway.

Posted by: R. Scott Buchanan on September 22, 2007 at 4:36 PM | PERMALINK

Yes and No!

Posted by: schrodinger's cat ate the excluded middle on September 22, 2007 at 4:38 PM | PERMALINK

Can't answer; means and methods; send me your FOIA request; I'll send Mr. Addington with dental implements out to deal with you...

Posted by: Richie Cheney @ undisclosed potty location on September 22, 2007 at 4:49 PM | PERMALINK

Here's some bathroom reading for you!

http://www.smirkingchimp.com/thread/10079

Posted by: slanted tom on September 22, 2007 at 4:52 PM | PERMALINK

No, of course not...what would be the point?

What's really odd is that we just had a discussion about this at dinner the other night.

Posted by: mrgumby2u on September 22, 2007 at 4:52 PM | PERMALINK

Come here often Cowboy...

Posted by: Larry Craig in the next stall on September 22, 2007 at 4:52 PM | PERMALINK

Since I'm alone in this bathroom and having homosexual fantasies, I'm going to kick my arse...Tyler Durden mano-a-mano style

Posted by: Tucker Carlson on September 22, 2007 at 4:55 PM | PERMALINK

Simply stated, "No"

Posted by: Brian on September 22, 2007 at 4:58 PM | PERMALINK

you know, you can find a lot of anal-compulsive behavior in people's private bathroom rituals.

Posted by: MonkeyBoy on September 22, 2007 at 5:05 PM | PERMALINK

I poop in the yard.

Posted by: Dave on September 22, 2007 at 5:06 PM | PERMALINK

Kevin: "Please explain your answer to this vital question of national security in 25 words or less."

Dude, that's soooo gnarly! Do you, like, moonlight as a screenwriter for all those video companies in Reseda?

(Sigh!) Orange County people are, like, so wierd -- I mean, like, just really totally, y'know?

Posted by: Donald from Hawaii, Channeling His Inner Valley Boy on September 22, 2007 at 5:07 PM | PERMALINK

I'm whizzing with the door open -- and I love it!

Posted by: admadm on September 22, 2007 at 5:12 PM | PERMALINK

Yes, usually, unless I'm certain no one is around and I'm only going to pee! Whee!

max
['Why? Are the Israelis going to launch a secret raid on my toilet?']

Posted by: max on September 22, 2007 at 5:25 PM | PERMALINK

So Kevin, will you have the balls to update this post with a "I'm sending this meme next to...."

Posted by: jerry on September 22, 2007 at 6:14 PM | PERMALINK

Yep, and I lock it too. True story: three couples, including my wife and I, spent a few days at a resort, sharing a three bedroom/two bathroom condo. I went to do a # 2, and found no lock on the door. So I shut it tight never expecting any intrusion. As I was wiping my ass, the brown paper being lifted off, one of the women barged in. She was horified (I was amused) and she cried out 'I didn't see that!'.

Posted by: Dilbert on September 22, 2007 at 6:14 PM | PERMALINK

Of course not; you never know when Senator Craig might come a-callin'. And he's a Very Important Personage -- can't keep The Man waiting.

Posted by: smartalek on September 22, 2007 at 6:14 PM | PERMALINK

Well, it's closed right now because I am writing this comment and reading Political Animal while also otherwise engaged. Can't have anyone seeing me in this position while catching up on the important news of the day!

Posted by: redterror on September 22, 2007 at 6:32 PM | PERMALINK

I use copies of the constitution for toilet paper.

Posted by: Hillary Rodham Clinton on September 22, 2007 at 6:43 PM | PERMALINK

Of course I do. I don't want the serial killer who is undoubtedly lurking somewhere in the house to be unnecessarily embarrassed.

Posted by: Bruce Moomaw on September 22, 2007 at 7:06 PM | PERMALINK

I have lived a lone for a long time; but, always with cats. I never close the bathroom door. However, when I have company and my company uses the bathroom, they close the door. My cats get really upset. They sit and meow at the closed door. They put their paws through the crack at the bottom. One even managed to open the door, much to my guest's and my chagrin.

Posted by: Mazurka on September 22, 2007 at 7:07 PM | PERMALINK

Depends. If the cats are upstairs, yes. If they are closed in the basement, no.

Posted by: RunawayRose on September 22, 2007 at 7:57 PM | PERMALINK

i piss off the back porch when no one else is around. i live on a farm in the middle of nowhere and i don't like to waste water

Posted by: andyvillager on September 22, 2007 at 7:58 PM | PERMALINK

I piss off the back porch too, but only at night, because the neighbors are working in their gardens during the day.

Posted by: Doc at the Radar Station on September 22, 2007 at 8:07 PM | PERMALINK

No. I have two children and two dogs. One of them is always needing me or nosing the door open whenever I go in. Why bother?

Posted by: cyrki on September 22, 2007 at 8:23 PM | PERMALINK

no.

Posted by: URK on September 22, 2007 at 8:38 PM | PERMALINK

No. Never. Why would I? (I don't even close it when I am not home alone, like when my husband is at home.

When my childen were small I used to close and lock it, and kept books in the bathroom. It was my sanity.

Posted by: Diane on September 22, 2007 at 9:52 PM | PERMALINK

I leave the door right where it is, but rotate the house until the frame meets the door.

Posted by: Einstein on September 22, 2007 at 9:56 PM | PERMALINK

No. But I've lived alone for 27 years. My wife and I keep separate apartments. We think it's the secret to our marital longevity.

Posted by: Slideguy on September 22, 2007 at 10:00 PM | PERMALINK

If I close the door, I can't get my foot out into the hallway.

Posted by: larry craig on September 22, 2007 at 10:14 PM | PERMALINK

Evacuations are for sissies and liberals

Posted by: G. Gordy Liddy on September 22, 2007 at 10:31 PM | PERMALINK

No. I need to hear if the phone rings, and I can't hear through the doors any longer.

Posted by: phein on September 22, 2007 at 10:46 PM | PERMALINK

No. I don't close the door. The door closes by itself.

Mid-night trips to the loo sometimes end up as bruising experience.

Posted by: Losthere on September 22, 2007 at 11:01 PM | PERMALINK

I guess that it depends on whether you have a wide stance or not....

Ask Larry Craig.

Posted by: The Conservative Deflator on September 22, 2007 at 11:09 PM | PERMALINK

No.

Posted by: Bronson on September 22, 2007 at 11:13 PM | PERMALINK

TMI. Way too much TMI.

Posted by: MLuther on September 22, 2007 at 11:15 PM | PERMALINK

Us country boys whiz outside. Indoors, a closed door keeps wet noses away from what the dogs think is a basset hound petting stool.

Posted by: Jethro on September 22, 2007 at 11:48 PM | PERMALINK

Kevin,

There's nothing like pulling a Lyndon Johnson when no one is there to witness it. Kinda of a tree in the forest...no?

2nd Lyndon post for me in 2 days.

Posted by: Jack on September 23, 2007 at 12:59 AM | PERMALINK

No.

In fact, if she's upstairs, I might not close it.

Explanation: watchin too much Bush.

But there is also a tale here. Once a repairman was in our house and he asked to use the rest room. I said OK and pointed him down the hall. Apparently, he was completely baffled by the pocket door and, in the end, decided we must be strange people with no door on the bathroom. All I know is after a couple of minutes of rustling from that direction, the loud, clear sound of blue collar tinkling wafted down the hall unimpeded.

Posted by: pjcamp on September 23, 2007 at 1:05 AM | PERMALINK

I make sure the outside doors are locked if I'm home alone (someone mentioned Psycho -- that and In Cold Blood keep me in line).

But, I don't worry about the inside doors.

Posted by: katiebird on September 23, 2007 at 1:54 AM | PERMALINK

No. Why bother?

Posted by: cvcobb01 on September 23, 2007 at 2:16 AM | PERMALINK

My wife never closes the door alone or not. I always do. My wife has 6 cats who love to jump in my lap.

Posted by: merlallen on September 23, 2007 at 5:41 AM | PERMALINK

Hell, I don't even close it when there ARE people around.

Posted by: Riggsveda on September 23, 2007 at 6:33 AM | PERMALINK

I always close the front door whether I'm alone or not.

Posted by: Bob on September 23, 2007 at 7:25 AM | PERMALINK

...I used to. But after my son was born I had to stop closing it all the way. If I closed it he would raise such a racket right outside that it became counterproductive to peaceful bathroom moments...

Posted by: gordy on September 23, 2007 at 7:35 AM | PERMALINK

NO...and this was the most LOL reading of comments to a blog question EVER!!!!! Y'all are so right about kids and pets....

Posted by: Dancer on September 23, 2007 at 8:32 AM | PERMALINK

No. My two cranky & geriatric cats won't let me.

Posted by: Helena Montana on September 23, 2007 at 9:52 AM | PERMALINK

Yep, force of habit.

Posted by: Aa on September 23, 2007 at 10:06 AM | PERMALINK

No.

The cats see it as a perfect opportunity to get some quality scratching time too.

Posted by: Peej on September 23, 2007 at 10:12 AM | PERMALINK

Balzar is being very unscientific asserting that "that aroma" isn't therapeutic. How do we know without a proper study?

Any volunteers?

Posted by: ferd on September 23, 2007 at 12:02 PM | PERMALINK

No.

And when I am not alone, I never forget to do so.

Posted by: Yancey Ward on September 23, 2007 at 12:51 PM | PERMALINK

To all of those regarding the smelly stuff, the secret is to light a match and then blow it out. Smell all gone. I learned that from a nurse in a pediatric ward.

Posted by: Mazurka on September 23, 2007 at 1:33 PM | PERMALINK

When I'm sharing living quarters with someone, yes, always. Whether anyone else is home or not, they might come home--and they might bring guests.

When I'm living alone, except for the pets, no, why would I? Except when showering in the winter: then, the temperature difference between the shower steam and the ambient household temperature is great enough to trigger the smoke alarm, which is a nuisance, and a closed door avoids that.

Nonplussed, I don't see it as a morality issue; I see it as a courtesy issue. There's nothing immoral about using the facilities, or being as naked as necessary for the purpose, but even your significant other doesn't necessarily want to unexpectedly experience the sight of you engaging in certain biological functions.

The dogs and cats, on the other hand, don't see what the fuss is all about.

Posted by: Lis on September 23, 2007 at 1:37 PM | PERMALINK

No, because almost every place I've lived has small bathrooms ... leaving the door open gives me the illusion of wide open spaces.

Posted by: melissa on September 23, 2007 at 2:39 PM | PERMALINK

Nope. I live alone...and also if I close any door between me and my dog he whines piteously.

Posted by: Dawn on September 23, 2007 at 3:57 PM | PERMALINK

I not only close the door when I'mn alone, I also lock it. Every time.

The rationale: the locked door should give me an extra .00005 seconds to pull up my pants should cops or bad guys break in.

Posted by: WisDem on September 23, 2007 at 10:07 PM | PERMALINK

The better question is how many people, guys especially, wash their hands after when noone is around? (I've noticed a growing lack of hand washing in public men's rooms)
But, to answer this question...no, unless there is someone around who is not used to the sights, sounds and smells of my bathroom use.

Posted by: Alfie Paul on September 24, 2007 at 7:35 AM | PERMALINK

Yes.

Please dear god think of the children!!!

Posted by: Jimbo2K7 on September 24, 2007 at 11:03 AM | PERMALINK

I'm amazed by how many other people's primary response is directly related to their dog or cat!? I though i had the only dog that needed to see a shrink! LOL

Count me among those who say NO because it's unexceptable to my dog for him to be locked out of the bathroom! :)

Posted by: Jason on September 24, 2007 at 1:23 PM | PERMALINK

I have to leave it open because the cats complain otherwise.

Posted by: Andy on September 24, 2007 at 2:53 PM | PERMALINK

No. Why?

And, Jimbo, by definition, the children aren't home.

Posted by: cmac on September 24, 2007 at 3:40 PM | PERMALINK

I used to close it, but then Suzy the poodle joined the household. By her reasoning, a human person sitting down is always an opportunity to be petted. She would scratch the varnish off the door and yap so that conducing business inside was out of the question. She trained me to leave the door open. Simple enough.

Posted by: Brownell on September 24, 2007 at 4:18 PM | PERMALINK

I normally do, but with a new kitty, there's no way I close doors anymore.

Posted by: Robin on September 24, 2007 at 4:58 PM | PERMALINK

No for no. 1, yes for no. 2 and I light a match.

Posted by: Anon on September 24, 2007 at 6:25 PM | PERMALINK




 

 

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