Editore"s Note
Tilting at Windmills

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December 26, 2007

ROVE'S BOOK DEAL....A few weeks ago, word surfaced that Karl Rove was shopping for a book publisher, and was poised to make a cool $3 million. He is, after all, Karl Rove. He's The Architect. As the greatest political mind of the decade, his book is bound to be awesome.

Or so the theory went. In reality, of course, Rove's not quite the legend he thinks he is, and interest in his book was tepid, at best. One recent report noted that Rove made the rounds with of publishers with a power lawyer at his side, and quickly found that there would be no bidding war. An executive at one of the houses said, "It's very, very slow."

Rove ended up with his deal late last week, but it's not exactly a blockbuster.

GOP strategist Karl Rove has agreed to write about his years as an adviser to President Bush in a deal worth over $1.5 million with former colleague Mary Matalin's conservative imprint at Simon & Schuster, officials said Friday.

One publisher was particularly uncharitable, saying Rove "doesn't have the personality" to land a major deal.

That may very well be part of it, but I think there's a more realistic explanation for Rove's book deal getting marked down.

First, he's tragically dishonest, so his book is unlikely to be informative. In fact, I'm fairly confident I can summarize the book now: "Bush was extraordinary; his critics were awful; and the media was unfair." There, I just saved book buyers $29.95.

Second, Rove had all kinds of dirt he could dish, but publishers realize that he's far too loyal a sycophant to ever make his former boss look bad. He's the original "loyal Bushie"; the idea of him writing a juicy tell-all is absurd. The book is bound to be hagiographic.

Third, Rove's genius has been wildly exaggerated, and interest in his insights has waned in light of his failures. On Election Day 2000, it was Rove's idea to keep his candidate in California in the waning days, instead of campaigning in key battleground states. Bush lost California by a wide margin, and Rove's strategy practically cost his candidate the election. More recently, Rove's single recent responsibility was overseeing the GOP's 2006 election strategy -- and Dems won back both chambers of Congress. If congressional Republicans stopped taking him seriously as a credible political strategist in 2007, who's going to take his book seriously in 2009?

And finally, there's severe Bush fatigue. I suspect the vast majority of the nation, and even a strong number of Republicans, are anxious to see the end of the reign of error known as the Bush presidency. The idea of a fomer White House deputy chief of staff reflecting, in a sycophantic style, on eight years that most of us will prefer to forget, doesn't exactly scream, "best seller."

That said, I open the floor to a little game: come up with a name for Karl Rove's book. The possibilities are almost endless.

Steve Benen 3:20 PM Permalink | Trackbacks | Comments (113)

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Comments

Triumph of the Will.

Posted by: Jim J on December 26, 2007 at 3:22 PM | PERMALINK

Mission Accomplished

Posted by: UberMitch on December 26, 2007 at 3:27 PM | PERMALINK

My Struggle

Posted by: POed Lib on December 26, 2007 at 3:27 PM | PERMALINK

"I Did It My Way"

Posted by: Marc L on December 26, 2007 at 3:27 PM | PERMALINK

Soon to appear in a remainder pile

Posted by: POed Lib on December 26, 2007 at 3:28 PM | PERMALINK

"Hop On Pop"

Posted by: Fighting Words on December 26, 2007 at 3:29 PM | PERMALINK

Big Time

Posted by: scooter on December 26, 2007 at 3:31 PM | PERMALINK

What's with the euro symbol in the middle of every instance of Rove's name in this post?

Cranky

Posted by: Cranky Observer on December 26, 2007 at 3:31 PM | PERMALINK

Math for Dummies

Posted by: Outis on December 26, 2007 at 3:32 PM | PERMALINK

Hitler's architect, Albert Speer, had no trouble getting his memoirs published.

Posted by: Speed on December 26, 2007 at 3:32 PM | PERMALINK

Psychopath on the Potomac

Posted by: Keith on December 26, 2007 at 3:38 PM | PERMALINK

Turd Blossom

Posted by: Voice of Reason on December 26, 2007 at 3:39 PM | PERMALINK

Oh, I was supposed to come up with a title.

Triumph of the Swill

How to Lose Friends and Influence Lobbyists

It Takes a Turd Blossom

My Role in the Village Idiot's Downfall

Posted by: Speed on December 26, 2007 at 3:40 PM | PERMALINK

Soon to appear in a remainder pile

Heh. When I posted about his anemic book deal, I made up a new word to describe it... Premaindered

Posted by: Blue Girl, Red State (aka G.C.) on December 26, 2007 at 3:40 PM | PERMALINK

The Origin of Turdbolssom;
"A political life founded upon Bull$h!t"

Posted by: kenny on December 26, 2007 at 3:41 PM | PERMALINK

The Turd as Will and Idea....

Posted by: Davis X. Machina on December 26, 2007 at 3:42 PM | PERMALINK

"How I squandered America's world reputation order to make a few bucks."

Posted by: goethean on December 26, 2007 at 3:45 PM | PERMALINK

Who will buy the book? The same right wing publishing company also owns the right wing book clubs that hawk this crap for $1 on townhall.com.

So in the first week on sale, the book club buys 95% of the titles, so it can get on the NYT best seller list.

Then it sinks like a stone off the chart. Once you are done wading through all the banner ads at wingnut websites for hard-on pills, weight loss, balding cures, and get rich fast schemes, you too can own this book, with other fabulous titles from acclaimed authors as sean hannity and michael savage, all for $1 each!

Posted by: Shin on December 26, 2007 at 3:48 PM | PERMALINK


An
Inconvenient
Turd

Posted by: dennisS on December 26, 2007 at 3:51 PM | PERMALINK

Well, I doubt it will be Atonement.

Posted by: jrw on December 26, 2007 at 3:51 PM | PERMALINK

"Lies"

Posted by: cleek on December 26, 2007 at 3:53 PM | PERMALINK

Isn't it obvious?

"Bush's Brain"

Posted by: vorkosigan1 on December 26, 2007 at 3:53 PM | PERMALINK

"My Dick--Your Ass"
subtitled "How I Fucked My Country, And You".

Posted by: cbear on December 26, 2007 at 3:56 PM | PERMALINK

I like DennisS's.

A couple of variations:

Triumph of the Turd

Bush's Turd

Turdmeister

Mein Turdkampf

Posted by: editer on December 26, 2007 at 3:58 PM | PERMALINK

It definitely has to have the Turdblossom theme in there somewhere.

Turd Cock from the Son?

Posted by: too ashamed to sign real name on December 26, 2007 at 3:59 PM | PERMALINK

A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Lawlessness

Posted by: Kevin on December 26, 2007 at 3:59 PM | PERMALINK

True Lies.

Posted by: whitewaterbadboy on December 26, 2007 at 4:04 PM | PERMALINK

Therapy and Understanding
My Recipe for a Better World

Posted by: Paul Dirks on December 26, 2007 at 4:05 PM | PERMALINK

"A Turd Blossoms"

"Male Bonding, the BUSHCO Way"

"Turds CAN Fly!"

"Extreme Makeover-Rove Style Constitution"

Posted by: mommadona on December 26, 2007 at 4:07 PM | PERMALINK

BushShit and Brainless - How We Destroyed America

Posted by: anon on December 26, 2007 at 4:07 PM | PERMALINK

Karl Snarls, Yanks Tank: Destroying America to Save It

George, the Two of Us Need Look No More: The Karl Rove Story

Towel Snapper to the King: The Mighty Memoirs of Karl "Turdblossom" Rove

Red-State Rover: The Creation of a Semipermanent Majority

Posted by: shortstop on December 26, 2007 at 4:09 PM | PERMALINK

Anatomy Of An Asshole

Posted by: cajun on December 26, 2007 at 4:09 PM | PERMALINK

Ha, anon and I had the same destruction theme in mind.

Posted by: shortstop on December 26, 2007 at 4:10 PM | PERMALINK

Turd Blossom Pisses on the Shrub - How Two Psychopaths Shredded the Constitution

Posted by: anon on December 26, 2007 at 4:15 PM | PERMALINK

We'll Always Have Diebold.

Posted by: mr insensitive on December 26, 2007 at 4:16 PM | PERMALINK

Also:

Rove, Rove, Rove Your Vote: One Man's Bold Vision for the Reformation of the American Ballot Box

and

McCain You Baby Daddy: Karl Rove and the Power of Political Anecdote

Posted by: shortstop on December 26, 2007 at 4:16 PM | PERMALINK

The Nightmare Years II
2001-2008

Posted by: Pop on December 26, 2007 at 4:23 PM | PERMALINK

I agree with Steve Benen's original post, but was surprised at an omission (although I suppose it could fall under point 2): Rove's tidbit that he "leaked" on Charlie Rose -- his preposterous claim that Democrats in Congress pushed for the Iraq war vote, not Bush. Rove was probably in the midst of his book negotiations at that point, and that was the best he could come up with: a transparent, and laughable, lie. It's no wonder that he didn't get his asking price.

Posted by: Jim E. on December 26, 2007 at 4:27 PM | PERMALINK

"All The Right Moves"

Posted by: raff on December 26, 2007 at 4:28 PM | PERMALINK

A Steaming Pile of Shit

Posted by: Wish He Had on December 26, 2007 at 4:28 PM | PERMALINK

Many good suggestions here. My humble offerings:

RoveSutra -- The Art of Lying


In Service of His Highness


Orgy of the Compassionate Conservatives

Posted by: rational on December 26, 2007 at 4:30 PM | PERMALINK

Dumbya and Me

Posted by: Swamp on December 26, 2007 at 4:30 PM | PERMALINK

An Inconvenient Turd

Posted by: apeman on December 26, 2007 at 4:31 PM | PERMALINK

Dumbya and Me

Dumbya and Dumbyer works better

Posted by: frankly0 on December 26, 2007 at 4:35 PM | PERMALINK

How 'bout:

Dr. TurdBlossom, Or How I Destroyed the Constitution and Ass-Raped the Country.

Posted by: bigcat on December 26, 2007 at 4:37 PM | PERMALINK

You named it. 'Reign of Error.'

Posted by: buddy66 on December 26, 2007 at 4:38 PM | PERMALINK

Conservative Fatassism: The Totatalitarian Temptation from Guantanamo Bay to Jeff Gannon's Bladder

Posted by: Roger Ailes on December 26, 2007 at 4:38 PM | PERMALINK

Boob, Crook and Condi

Posted by: Wireless on December 26, 2007 at 4:39 PM | PERMALINK

Totalitarian

Posted by: Roger Ailes on December 26, 2007 at 4:39 PM | PERMALINK

Protocols of the Elders of Austin

Posted by: Blabla on December 26, 2007 at 4:41 PM | PERMALINK

Let's see ... someone puts out the word that Rove is anticipating a $3 million advance, and he winds up with a paltry $1.5 million. Zounds, the humiliation.

I understand the bit of triumphalism engendered by the inverse bidding war, but the man we love to hate is still getting more money than most people will ever see for spending, I'd guess,a few dozen hours chatting with a ghostwriter. Merry fricken Christmas.

Posted by: weldon berger on December 26, 2007 at 4:46 PM | PERMALINK

The Audacity of Dope

Posted by: frankly0 on December 26, 2007 at 4:49 PM | PERMALINK

Looking for Mr. Turdbar.

The Turdblossom Trilogy -- 1) The Fellowship of the Turds, 2) The Two Towers, Can You Say 9/11?, 3)2004, The Return of the Turd.

Posted by: tomeck on December 26, 2007 at 4:49 PM | PERMALINK

Masters of Deceit

Lady Condi's Lover

Posted by: JEHoover on December 26, 2007 at 4:54 PM | PERMALINK

I, TurdBlossom. Maybe Turdblossom the God would be even better.

Posted by: SqueakyRat on December 26, 2007 at 4:56 PM | PERMALINK

"Major League Asshole"

"War and War"

"A Tale Too Shitty"

"The Madness of King George"

"Of Mice and Rats"

"Lies, and the Lying Liars Who Cash In"

"A Critique of Pure Evil"

Posted by: Repack Rider on December 26, 2007 at 4:57 PM | PERMALINK

After reading this book you'll understand why my mommy killed herself

Posted by: Elephant Hunter on December 26, 2007 at 4:58 PM | PERMALINK

"Managing the Electorate: My Successful Operation to Restore Republican Values to America"

Posted by: jim on December 26, 2007 at 5:03 PM | PERMALINK

Mein Kampf 2: Electric Boogaloo

Posted by: editer on December 26, 2007 at 5:05 PM | PERMALINK

We Made Our Own Reality

Posted by: badgervan on December 26, 2007 at 5:08 PM | PERMALINK

The Peter Principle: Practical Applications

The Evil of Banality

Posted by: kenga on December 26, 2007 at 5:08 PM | PERMALINK

A title that's got some combination of "Turdblossom" and "Rosebud" in it.

Posted by: Doc at the Radar Station on December 26, 2007 at 5:09 PM | PERMALINK

1.5 million is still a pretty freaking big advance.

Unless the "deal" isn't just an advance.

Posted by: jayackroyd on December 26, 2007 at 5:11 PM | PERMALINK

Ship of Tools

Topic of Cancer

Jeff and Me

Posted by: TBR on December 26, 2007 at 5:12 PM | PERMALINK

[Forget] You, and the Donkey You Rode In On

Posted by: Tom in Houston on December 26, 2007 at 5:18 PM | PERMALINK

The Big Con

Fear and Loathing in Washington
my strategy for electoral success

Puppetmaster
how I turned a deserter into commander in chief

Sockpuppets
Making journalists kiss your ass...and like it.

Posted by: Common Sense on December 26, 2007 at 5:20 PM | PERMALINK

This is Your Brain on Turds

Posted by: dennisS on December 26, 2007 at 5:21 PM | PERMALINK

TURDBLOSSOM!

(subtitled)
Would you be more likely to buy this book if you knew that liberals were trying to censor it?

Posted by: coldhotel on December 26, 2007 at 5:23 PM | PERMALINK

MC Rove

Posted by: D. on December 26, 2007 at 5:30 PM | PERMALINK

"Georgie an Me, The Reach-around"

Posted by: cbear on December 26, 2007 at 5:32 PM | PERMALINK

Brown Nose, Brown Shirt: It's not the color of your skin that matters most

Posted by: R Johnston on December 26, 2007 at 5:33 PM | PERMALINK

Profiles in Turdage

Posted by: dennisS on December 26, 2007 at 5:35 PM | PERMALINK

"I winked and he wanked"

Posted by: Denotenator on December 26, 2007 at 5:39 PM | PERMALINK

Turd Reich!

On the Road to a Republican Majority

--------
The Turd Way

American Politics in the Turd Millennium

--------

Major Turds

A Musical Journey Through the Bush Presidency

--------

Turd and Constitution

Life in the Axis of Power

--------

Sloppy Turds

--------

My Turd Act in American Politics

--------

I Am Turd

(apologies to Gale Sayers)

---------

Turd Time Around


Posted by: dan robinson on December 26, 2007 at 5:40 PM | PERMALINK

I'm Evil, Bush Thinks I'm Smart and Nobody Likes Me
Hate The Gays, Love The War
Why The Media Fears Me So

Posted by: ihateemo on December 26, 2007 at 5:43 PM | PERMALINK

Book Title: "The Turd That Didnt Blossom"

Posted by: Ya Know.. on December 26, 2007 at 5:48 PM | PERMALINK

A Convenient Lie

Whitey's Bush
(Zweites Buch)

Karl Rove and the Prisoner of Abu Ghraib

Posted by: Aaron on December 26, 2007 at 5:57 PM | PERMALINK

"Triumph of Arrogance"

Posted by: Oldfool on December 26, 2007 at 6:03 PM | PERMALINK


"Intoxicated: The Smell of George W. Bush's Ass"

Posted by: marty on December 26, 2007 at 6:17 PM | PERMALINK

"I fooled them all and made a lot of money."

Posted by: tom on December 26, 2007 at 6:31 PM | PERMALINK

To Love a Cowboy

Posted by: Karl Rove on December 26, 2007 at 6:37 PM | PERMALINK

steaming turd, hidden blossum

Posted by: B on December 26, 2007 at 6:43 PM | PERMALINK

Magnum Farce

Posted by: Econobuzz on December 26, 2007 at 6:54 PM | PERMALINK

Towel Snapper to the King: The Mighty Memoirs of Karl "Turdblossom" Rove

Shortstop, you are amazing!

Posted by: Edo on December 26, 2007 at 7:08 PM | PERMALINK

Present at the Destruction

Posted by: Matt on December 26, 2007 at 7:55 PM | PERMALINK

"Rove Is Just a Four-Letter Word"

Posted by: Snarkworth on December 26, 2007 at 8:28 PM | PERMALINK

All Hat and No Cattle: the Secret of My Success

How to Sell Cow Chips and Influence People

Posted by: Lefth Patriot on December 26, 2007 at 9:20 PM | PERMALINK

"Mary Matalin called in some favors and all I got is a lousy $1.5 million: Only now will I talk. Or maybe not. -- Ain't I cute?"

Posted by: Tilli (Mojave Desert) on December 26, 2007 at 9:29 PM | PERMALINK

Flushed! Tales of a Desparately Spinning Turd

Posted by: snicker-snack on December 26, 2007 at 10:10 PM | PERMALINK

_I Gave Up Hope, Lied, + It Worked!_

_Appetite for Self-Destruction_

_Can You Believe People Will Still Buy This Crap?_

_Lie For Your Country_

_Your Blood; Their Oil; Our Profit_

-Z

Posted by: Zorro on December 26, 2007 at 10:43 PM | PERMALINK

Steal This Book (But we'll never be even!)

Posted by: jcricket on December 26, 2007 at 11:21 PM | PERMALINK

"All the President's Yes-Men"

Posted by: Otto Man on December 26, 2007 at 11:58 PM | PERMALINK

My Pet President

Posted by: craigie on December 27, 2007 at 12:28 AM | PERMALINK

How about "Before the Evolution"?

Posted by: Anon on December 27, 2007 at 1:47 AM | PERMALINK

Rove is smart only compared to Bush. Rove was successful for not being constrained by morals, not for his genius.

"How to Make Enemies and Influence Friends"


Posted by: JohnK on December 27, 2007 at 2:00 AM | PERMALINK

Ship of Fools

Posted by: Jay in Oregon on December 27, 2007 at 2:20 AM | PERMALINK

Don't Touch Me!

Posted by: Daro on December 27, 2007 at 2:37 AM | PERMALINK

Saving America from the Libs

Posted by: bill on December 27, 2007 at 7:28 AM | PERMALINK

the world's first totally fictional autobiography

* Your Reality may Vary

Posted by: freepatriot on December 27, 2007 at 7:32 AM | PERMALINK

Forbidden Love: Confessions of a Turd Blossom

Posted by: Lefty Patriot on December 27, 2007 at 7:39 AM | PERMALINK

Less than Zero...Credibility

The Fixer

The Ring of the Lords: The Three Towers

Posted by: Orville on December 27, 2007 at 8:48 AM | PERMALINK

"How I Made a Drunk Closet Case President"

Posted by: Jeffrey Davis on December 27, 2007 at 9:46 AM | PERMALINK

The Voracious Hicory Horned Devil

Posted by: evagrius on December 27, 2007 at 10:41 AM | PERMALINK


"The asses of evil"

Posted by: Albert on December 27, 2007 at 1:18 PM | PERMALINK

Turd happens

Posted by: Jay in Oregon on December 27, 2007 at 3:00 PM | PERMALINK

The Secret II: Harness Your Inner Turd

Posted by: anon on December 27, 2007 at 3:07 PM | PERMALINK

Karl Rove: I Fucked America, And So Can You!

Posted by: Ben on December 27, 2007 at 4:43 PM | PERMALINK

You CAN Fool Most of the People, Most of the Time
(Especially Right Wing Church Members)

The 51% Solution

I Rock - I Mean IRAQ

Posted by: muddylee on December 27, 2007 at 5:26 PM | PERMALINK

The Truthiness Hurts

Posted by: Kawika Holbrook on December 27, 2007 at 6:52 PM | PERMALINK

A Turd Blossoms in Texas

Posted by: JCB on December 27, 2007 at 7:38 PM | PERMALINK

Fans drive hundreds of miles to partake in these pre-game gatherings, which are often a bigger attraction than the game itself. ,

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