For another, it's difficult to imagine which member of Congress would be the first to seriously propose offering tax dollars to Larry Flynt.

But imagine the lobbying!

Did April Fool's Day come early this year? This can't be real.

they should have waited a little longer before making their request. surely they're sensitive to the problem of bailing out prematurely.

(hey, you said we were to insert puns. yeah i know you said "inappropriate" and i just read it as "really bad." oops.)

This is the perfect project for Sen. Larry Craig!

Get him out of the bathroom and on top of this ASAP!

This blog needs an enema.

McCain, Joe the Plumber, and Penthouse?

There must be a lack of serious news in the world right now.

Sadly for the porn industry, the bailout money is spent--and satisfied, and enjoying a cigarette.

When it comes to exposing Washington's hypocrisy, Larry Flynt has no peers. Remember during the Clinton impeachment debacle how he tried to reveal the names of adulterous Republicans?

Flynt must have went to deep producing 'Nailin' Palin.' I think that's the thrust of his argument.

It is troubling when adult entertainers are down on their knees like this. There will be some push back, but I'm certain the government will bend over for them and they'll get it in the end.

From Floyd Norris today:

"You may never have heard of Friendfinder Networks, a company that is trying to go public in this market — and plans to list on the New York Stock Exchange if it does find buyers. But you may have known of the company under its previous name: Penthouse Media Group. It publishes a magazine of that name, which competes with Playboy.

"Penthouse, as you may recall, went bankrupt in 2003. It was taken over by the cleverly named Pet Capital Partners, which gained control by buying up Penthouse bonds that received stock in the reorganization.

"Rarely have I seen a prospectus that makes quite as clear why the company wants to sell stock: it is in default on its debt and has no financing lined up. If investors will not put up enough money, Bankruptcy No. 2 looms."

http://norris.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/01/07/going-bust-again/

Sounds like Larry's coming up a little short.

Frankly, I'd rather give $5,000,000,000 to Larry Flynt than give $700,000,000,000 to the assholes who created this economic mess. I trust the porn industry more than Wall St. At least the porn industry is up-front about who is getting fucked.

Steve, it must be a slow news day.

For another, it's difficult to imagine which member of Congress would be the first to seriously propose offering tax dollars to Larry Flynt.

How about David Vitter?

What Chief Angry Cloud said. At least with Flynt we'd get something of real value for our money.

doubtful is my hero. That was just awesome.

I don't know that we need to feel sorry for the porn industry. I think they're just trying to cram it down everybody's throat.

Uhh, somebody like David Vitter could support this?

Larry Craig is "out," so to speak, otherwise he could be a go-to.

Penthouse should wait and put in their claim together with Pentagon; in the supplemental. IOW, "not tonight, Josephine; tonight, Joe has a headache".

Wait a second, wait a second! Everybody calm down here.

"Girls Gone Wild" is the biggest selling mail order film on the planet. If it goes down, thousands of post offices go down. Thousands of postal workers will be left jobless and mumbling on street corners, thinking of going postal.

And if Hustler goes down it will affect the entire forest industry, thousnds of lumberjacks, log transporters, paper transporters, printers and newsstand operators.

The truth is, both Girls Gone Wild and Hustler are too big to fail!

George Bush and the Republicans screwed America. We should at least be able to watch.

Crankily yours,

For another, it's difficult to imagine which member of Congress would be the first to seriously propose offering tax dollars to Larry Flynt.

But it's easy to name members of Congress who are eager to offer tax CUTS to Larry Flynt.

--TP

Perhaps the Democrats will finally experience some stiffness, in their spines at last.

The truth is, both Girls Gone Wild and Hustler are too big to fail! -The New York Crank

I mean, sure, they're not as big as AIG or GM, but really, it's not the size, but how you use it.

Now, obviously congress isn't just going to jump in the sack with them right away. They're going to have to massage them a little. Flynt may not be much of a looker these days, but he is a cunning linguist.

If I were an old, sexually-repressed senator opposed to a porn industry bailout, all it would take to change my mind is a lap dance with Jenny Hendrix.

It's safe for work. But just barely.

I can't imagine this is anywhere near serious. Isn't anyone suspicious about the fact that the source for this is a PR firm & the announcement coincides with the opening of an industry trade show?

And, if the GOP wants to be part of the stimulus on the ground floor, we could have things like Nailin Palin Part II with "Bristol," or a line of "Joe the Plumber" movies.

Seriously, who loses money making porn? It's like losing money running a casino -- you have to work really hard to screw up a guaranteed money-making business.

Given that it's Joe Francis and Larry Flynt, I'm definitely smelling a prank here.

I'm sure Roland Burris's taint would be interested.

Seriously, who loses money making porn?

Didn't Phil Gramm lose a bundle on a porn movie? One is tempted to make an observation about Republicans so inept they don't even know how to...but that would be ungracious.

Seriously, who loses money making porn?

R Kelly?

Too soon?

Rumors on the street are that Handi Wipe and Goo Gone Cleaner are delaying their merger. A spokesman for the proposed new company, Hand Goo Gone, said that the current situation is sticky: "Six months ago we had a big wad to blow but now we don't how long it will take to get out of this hole. The porn industry's flaccid sales would impact our bottom line deeply. We hope the government will lend a helping hand."

Why not? Everything we do in this country is crazy.

Linda Lovelace:

"I've had it up to here with bailouts!"

What's the difference between political porn and Flynt's variety?

does gop john boner know about this!

I heard that, in these tough economic times, Dolly Parton was planning on buying up a bunch of stores. Namely "Harris Teeter," "Piggly Wiggly," and "Big Lots."

She's going to call them "Big Wiggly Teeters."

[bah-dum, chshsh!]

Oh, sure, the CIA can airlift pallets of Viagra to warlords in Afghanistan, but, not one cent worth for national treasures, such as Ron Jeremy or Randy Spears.

Plus, what will happen to the retirement plans for Annette Haven and Seka, if the Porn Industry is not bailed out? Not to forget Little Oral Annie.

I think these guys are misunderstanding the concept of a "stimulus" package, as meant by Obama.