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September 17, 2012 8:13 AM Snarky Campaign Slogan Contest

By Andrew Sabl

My friends at The Democratic Strategist have for a while now been running at the top of their home page a picture of an Etch-a-Sketch containing the words, “Romney: you may not agree with what he says but you can trust him to deny he ever said it.”

That’s good. And it’s the kind of snarky wit we need more of in American campaigns, which tend to veer between the two great, awful, American registers, namely Midwestern Nice and moralized outrage—or sometimes American Jeremiad, an art form which by platypusing the worst aspects of both those registers manages at once to voice optimism, or at best Christian hope, and self-righteousness.

So: I hereby solicit candidates for the best snarky campaign slogan. Entries may be original or may quote somebody else, but if the latter please give proper credit. The goal is not a campaign slogan that would actually be effective—which would almost certainly require less snark—but shivviness: cruelty, humor (or better, humour), and the shock of recognition that comes from naming a truth, or at least an effective partisan accusation.

I have my own suggestion: “Vote GOP: it’s great to have a party of old people led by children.” If you can do better than that, please do.

[Slogans from the other side are welcome too, and I hope I can take a joke at my team’s own expense. Try to top this, as you probably can: “Vote Obama. Because a nice speech makes unemployment all better.”]

The winner will receive eternal fame in this space, and a gift certificate for a Heffalump. The contest ends Wednesday at noon, Pacific time.

[Cross-posted at The Reality-based Community]

Andrew Sabl is a professor of public policy and political science at the University of California, Los Angeles.
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Comments

  • Jeff Johnson on September 17, 2012 3:53 PM:

    Vote GOP: We broke it. We can fix it.

    Vote GOP: We did it before, and we can do it again.

    GOP: Because Cutting Taxes and Invading is better than cutting and running.

    Romney: Retruthing the American Dreamers

    Romney: Let safety out of the net

    Romney: Securitizing American Futures

    The White Way is the Romney Way

    Romney: America's White Knight after a Dark Night

    Romney: Red blooded, all white, and true blue

    Romney: Believe him when he says your beliefs are his beliefs.

    Nobody can pin down the uncolored and unvarnished Romney Truth.

    You want a man or a boy? Vote Romney.

    Romney: Retelling the Truth Our Way

    Romney: One of us.

    Romney: One of our kind, ya'll.

    Romney, America's CEO, with the Frequent Buyer's Protection Plan.

  • Andrew Sabl on September 20, 2012 9:41 PM: